A series of apologies and relationships that just didn’t work out, click here for part 1.
I put you up on a pedestal the moment I saw you. I was pretty young at the time and boy was I lost. I was the definition of a rebel without a cause, an emo kid who couldn’t cheer up. You looked a lot like the lead singer of my favorite band and I fell in love. I was so weird and such an outcast at the time – you barely gave me a second glance.
But I adjusted. Ditched some of my more unusual clothes and dyed my hair a natural color. I tried to get your attention any time I could. It kind of worked. But I was still so much younger, and you should’ve known how naïve I was. You should have known by the way I followed you around like a puppy that you should’ve just cut me off. You shouldn’t have paid me any attention.
One time you kissed me on the forehead on my front porch. I think a part of me died inside while a part of me felt alive. You wrote me a story, you wrote me a song. Pulled out all the tricks to make me fall harder. One time you made me cry in the hallway – I’m not sure you even knew about it. But it was because I know you didn’t like me the way that I liked you.
I’m glad it didn’t work out, though. I got my first real taste of what it was like to get over someone. That heartbreak ended up being less rough than my first real and true and horrible heartbreak. It helped me grow. Helped me find out what I wanted and what I deserved. I became a little less naïve.
And it never would’ve truly worked out. We were going to be at two different places in our lives and I preferred it happening sooner rather than later. Because I moved on to different people who taught me even more about myself. And even now I think we’ve both grown and become so different it’s hard to even imagine we were together in the same place at one point.
I’m glad it didn’t work out but I’m also glad that we provided each other a little bit of happiness in a short amount of time. That small town was so bleak, we were destined to move on. And I’m glad it didn’t work out because it all seems to be working out for us now in our separate places.