Self destructive behaviors are hard to avoid. You could be self centered, a bad listener, a serial dater, a player, a flirt – just someone who is constantly making things worse for themselves and for others.
Social media makes it very easy for us to become jealous of others. We are constantly exposed to everyone else’s lives and the grass always looks greener on the other side. Plus they’re getting more likes than us on Instagram.
But it’s okay to want attention – I’d be a little worried if you didn’t. No matter how self sufficient you are, you don’t want to get to the point of independence where you’re actually isolating yourself and making yourself lonely.
So we seek attention from others. Whether it’s wanting a lot of retweets or wanting a boy to flirt with you at the bar, sometimes we just need some validation. It’s okay to want that every once in a while. On the days you’re feeling low and something as simple as a compliment on your smile can turn your whole day around.
The key is not to need the attention. You do not want to be reliant on the approval of others. You are the main component to your own happiness, if you are not relying on yourself you will never be able to rely properly on other people.
Another key is to not destruct other people’s lives in the search of attention. You can take someone’s admiration, but you shouldn’t lead it anywhere with false intentions. It will hurt you and it will hurt someone else.
So yea, take pride in someone buying you a drink at the bar. And accept the flirty snapchats. But always accept them with caution, care, and the best intentions in mind.
Rosie Culture 
I enjoyed your post you have some great content
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Thanks 🙂
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Excellent advice. I need to remember all of this. I sometimes wonder if life (and blogs) isn’t all about exchanging attention somehow. Some exchanges of attentions escalate into deeper relationships and others don’t. Food for thought – tha is Rosie. 🙂
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I would definitely say blogging is a form of exchanging attention, but at least it’s positive reinforcement over searching for attention in negative ways 🙂
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Agree most wholeheartedly. I like that there isn’t a dislike button. 🙂
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Great post and very true x
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Thank you 🙂
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I like that you differentiate between attention you want and attention you need. Very accurate.
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Thank you! Two very different things 🙂
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🙂 I think you are along the right lines with the jealousy social media analogy, WordPress is seductive however bloggers DO portray the positive side of their life which is only natural. But just as real as jealousy is a feeling of longing to meet longing to help a blogger. I correspond with a lady I’ve met through WordPress, we make each other laugh and get on so well, in fact I’d love to meet her only trouble she lives in Germany!
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I’ve found WordPress is the healthiest form of social media 🙂 Deep down, bloggers want attention, but this platform is so positive and supportive it is just like another friendship
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I totally agree, I met another lady last summer from WP, two lonely people who had a picnic together sat next to a canal in the sunshine. We talked non stop for three hours and she later emailed me to say she went to bed exhausted. This will interest you, we both recognised each other through honest posts and replies, so spooky how comfortable we were with each other from the minute we hugged at the Railway Station.
However alas no romance, long story I won’t bore you with. Lovely lady though.
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That is a nice story! 🙂 WordPress is such an awesome community
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(And the photo she sent on my birthday 😀 didn’t help!!!)
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Reblogged this on Engineer Marine Skipper and commented:
Title is big meaningful #focus
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Thanks for reblogging 🙂
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Welcome
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Thank you for your support and leadership 💐💐💐
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think you’re spot on. “we just need some validation” – this is especially true when one considers that so much the marketing world is aimed at making us feel inadequate and lacking, which is why we need buy their product or service. We do need validating, but as your post points to, we need to ask ourselves just what is it within ourselves that we seeking to have validated. For example: am I having my compassion validated or my ability to backstab my way to the top for the purpose of power and financial gain?
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I believe it’s good to seek attention on something that we had created. For e.x. someone wanted his Youtube channel or blog reaches millions because it is his creative side and wanted that it should be seen by millions and recognize them. In that case, it’s awesome to seek attention from my point of view.
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Interesting perspective (I say that in a good way).
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I think there is a good point here about accepting and indulging a normal human need in moderation, but not taking it to the point of excess
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Great advice . Love your post .
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