How To Know If Your Date Went Well

Dating is hard. Essentially you have to sit down to dinner or drinks with someone you barely know and get to know them as fast as you can so you can decide if you want to endure the whole painfully awkward thing all over again.

It’s really hard to know if a date is going well. I’ve gone on dates that I thought were great and never got a text back. I’ve gone on dates that I thought were horrible and the guy was crushed when I rejected a second date.

We are all blinded by the fact that we want someone to love, so we will do anything and commit to anyone when we are feeling this lonely.

So how do you know a date is going well?

1.If neither of you itches to pick up your phone – that’s a good sign. If your date checks their phone more than five times or says “sorry my friend is asking for advice” or “my group chat is blowing up.” I can understand that, but you’re still being rude and this date is obviously not going well.

2. Awkward lulls are fine. Sometimes you need to pause, think of a new topic, take a sip of your drink. But too many long and awkward lulls where you are struggling to keep the conversation going means the date is not going well. The conversation should be light and easy and just go at its own pace without an enormous amount of force.

3. If there is mention of doing something together in the future, like you said you like soccer so you guys should go to a soccer game sometime, then that is a good sign the date is going well.

4. The weirdness that occurs when the check comes can tell you A LOT about how the date went. If you offer to pay and he gets uncomfortable, or if he accepts but there’s still a weird vibe, or if he pays and complains about the check – it didn’t go well. If he offers to pay the whole thing no problem or accepts your offer to pay casually, that’s a better sign.

5. A kiss at the end of the night. I know this is controversial to some – some would say a kiss on a first date is too soon. This could be true if the date didn’t go well or if you still feel like awkward strangers. A good kiss at the end of the night is a good indicator that the date went well.

But sadly, like I said, dating is hard. You could get good sign after good sign after good sign – and they still don’t want to go out with you again. Or vice versa! The key is not to think too much about it during the date – but after you can truly evaluate how you think the date went and not pain yourself with the thoughts of if he really liked you or not.

Good luck, single friends, dating is a vicious game.

31 thoughts on “How To Know If Your Date Went Well

  1. Rejection hurts especially when you’ve had a lovely afternoon together, I met a lady we had a picnic by a river talked all afternoon BUT she said I wasn’t her type, I’m not upset because she was honest and declined in a lovely way, it hurt at the time but hey such is life………….(touched her bra cup by mistake long story and she couldn’t stop laughing……… a good ice breaker NOT!)

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      1. Honesty is always best. A question for the ladies, when you’re with your date, say sat opposite him in the restaurant, I wonder if you’re thinking ‘would he make a good father to our children?’ Just a thought πŸ˜€

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  2. If I was feeling it, I would always mention that we should do something in the future. And if they agreed pretty quickly I always knew things were going well. And you are so right, dating really is vicious and a hard thing to go through. I also wish the single ones luck.

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  3. I remember the days before mobiles so the following comment is know doubt influenced by the fact that I am a prehistoric survival from a bygone age! I do own and regularly use my mobile. However when I am out with friends (let alone on a date) I turn it off and only switch the phone on again if there is a good reason to do so, for example the need to call a cab or contact a friend who hasn’t turned up after having promised to do so to find out what has happened to them. Technology should be our servant but it is turning into our master. We should give our full attention to our friends or a date not be fiddling around with our phones. Maybe I should sign this a grumpy middle-aged man! Kevin

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    1. Nope I totally agree! My friends and I can be very understanding of using our phones a little during our time together, but a date is almost like an interview to me and I’d never pull my phone out and just start texting someone else!

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  4. I was thinking about the dating game and why it frustrated me when I attempted it. Dating is a skill (everything is a skill really) and the way we improve skills is with practice and feedback — but with dating no one wants to give honest feedback (nor do we really want to receive it). With art, it might feel like someone is being personal if they are overly critical but I can still acknowledge that it isn’t personal and do my best to improve my next attempt. With dating, feedback is personal and that can be hard. I also want to note that while dating is a skill, connection is not. Sometimes people are just different and won’t vibe. That’s fine. But when you’re a socially awkward self conscious person, dating is… terrible, lol.

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      1. You’re doing the right thing though. You’re going out, meeting new people and having fun. Also this blog helps serve as a way for you to get feedback/advice. And I didn’t comment on this earlier but your list is dead on accurate.

        I do want to add this though, if you think a date went well but you don’t hear back — sometimes when I would date a girl, if I felt she was ‘out of my league’ I wouldn’t try to contact her again. Sooo maybe just drop a text or message back after a few days to say hi, just to see what happens.

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  5. Wonderful post! It’s always a gamble going on a date. There are so many factors, sometimes it all goes well and at times nothing does. But great pointers for analysing a date after! Great post Rosie πŸ‘β˜Ί

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      1. Yes, it certainly does seem that way at times. But what about love then? How will we ever find love, if we refuse to take that risk. Wouldn’t we just make it harder for ourselves? What are your thoughts?

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      2. πŸ˜‚ Trust me, that only happens in the movies! I think these romantic movies make it hard to find love in real life. But if you insist, what street do you use the most? Maybe I’ll spontaneously bump into you there…. Hahaha πŸ˜œπŸ˜‚

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      3. Hahaha… Okies! πŸ˜‚ But, sometimes we need to put pieces together ourselves. So name a street, and maybe your true love happens to read it here and comes looking for you! Isn’t that hope too ? 😜

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  6. I’m actually going on a second date tonight so thanks for the pointers!
    We actually went to school together about 6 years ago, then went to different universities, so we’re not total strangers which helps I guess.
    I always pay on the first date, then agree to go halves on the dates to come.

    I just hope I haven’t used up all my good jokes!!!

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  7. In my opinion if you want to behave and look at your best, don’t put all of your eggs in one basket. Go on dates with different people and take your time to observe them. Instead of asking ”what impression does he have about me?” ask your self ”do i like him?”
    By keeping your options open you don’t give off a desperate feeling and if something awsome comes up, you can always stop and date them exclusively!

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    1. I totally agree! I find it really hard to focus on more than one person at a time though, just dating one person gives me enough anxiety lol but it would be more productive to go on multiple first dates with different people to get a better feel

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  8. I really enjoyed reading your post. It gave me a chance to reflect on mine. πŸ™‚ I’ve gotten asked a lot for a date and I knew them enough to say,”no,” they were jerks, honestly. So, my first date went very…well. We are still together and it’ll be 10 months very soon! πŸ™‚ When I went on my first date I asked myself this question (some of you may think this is a far forward question but it’s good for you to ask) would I marry him? Yes, would I marry him? This is a question you can ask when you otter enough information about the other person. πŸ™‚ Thanks for posting!

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    1. Thanks for reading! I think you should be especially picky on your first date, especially if you’ve been dating a while! The person you’re going to marry should be taken very seriously and if on the first date you see zero chance of that happening, it’s probably time to move on. Glad your relationship is working out well πŸ™‚

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