Settling usually comes from desperation. You are desperate to be loved, to be happy, to find the one, to have what other people have. So desperate, in fact, that you will settle with anyone just to feel an ounce of the emotions you are looking for.
We’re all a little desperate, being single makes us that way. We may be happy alone, but we still get lonely. We see the love that others share and we want a bite of it. Desperation ensues.
So when you do finally find someone that you want to be in a committed relationship with, it’s easy to ask yourself – am I settling?
For me, it’s one of my biggest fears. Because I’ve done it before and it ended so horribly. But there are a couple of ways to know that this person is the real deal.
If it took you a long time to actually find someone you wanted to be in a relationship with, you’re not settling. You were still being picky and not just choosing someone for the sake of being loved.
If you feel happy all the time when you’re with them, you’re not settling. Tiny doubts are always normal – you have to look at the big picture.
If your dreams, goals , ambitions, and hobbies match up, you’re not settling. It sounds like you’ve found a true partner to go through life with.
You might have been desperate, but that doesn’t mean you settled. A settling relationship hits bumps in the road pretty quick. If this person is the person who makes you truly happy – you didn’t settle, you just found the right one.