Putting Too Much Time Into Dead Friendships

We weigh our relationships by importance. Sometimes family comes first, sometimes your significant other, sometimes your friends.

The only problem with this is when we put too much weight into a friendship that has been long gone. A friendship where you have been laying on the effort and none has been given back in return.

It might be your first instinct to try to fix this dead friendship again. But more often than not, you’ll find yourself trying to fix it again just a short time later.

Stop putting so much time into dead friendships, relationships, whatever. Slow down and evaluate how much you’re really benefiting from the friendship. If it’s a whole lot of drama, a whole lot of heart ache, a lot of unanswered texts and plans that get canceled – you don’t need it.

Stop putting all your effort on one side of the scale, because you’ll see very quickly how unbalanced that friendship truly is. And more effort on your side won’t fix it. Some people just won’t value you the way that you value them. That’s okay, not everyone has to be as great as you are. But what’s not okay is giving them the time of day when all they do is drag you down.

hc
photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/ginevrabariosco/

 

18 thoughts on “Putting Too Much Time Into Dead Friendships

  1. Love this post. I’m a social person so I find I put a lot into my friendships but it often isn’t returned. I think when you feel like you’re having to chase the other person down and you’re the one making all the effort, it’s time to let go.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ve had to do this in the last few years. It tears me into pieces every time I have to do it, and, unfortunately, the emptiness doesn’t get filled. When you’re single and almost-50, it’s kind-of a catch-22. On one hand, I don’t have the time and energy and mental resources to put up with a dead friendship. But on the other hand, it’s just hard to find new friends, and even the ones I do have are busy with husbands and kids. And I’m just like…hi.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Finding new friends is hard at any age so I definitely understand!! I have struggled with this as well, I only have like 5 friends so to ditch any of them would leave me a little more lonely. But sometimes the sacrifice is worth it, because it takes so much energy like you said!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Friendship varies from person to person, but true as you said it’s important how much one value to each other makes it works best otherwise it’s mostly hanging on one side which is not good! Great post! Keep up ! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Fab words. I’m afraid Facebook killed the meaning of the word ‘friend’ for me. The race to accumulate numbers lost any sense of reality for me. I might be in a minority, I know. Most will only eventually count true friends on one hand, though. The rest will simply be acquaintances.

    Liked by 1 person

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