Doing The Long Distance Relationship Thing

Temporarily, my boyfriend is living in New Jersey while I’m in New Hampshire. And while this is only for a month and not really a long distance relationship, it makes me really reflect on the people who are open to doing long distance.

My first boyfriend and I were long distance for pretty much our whole relationship. We were never more than two hours apart, but many factors ended up keeping us at a distance. When he was in college, I was in high school and when I was in college he was working and living in the city. Our relationship was forced into these spurts of time together on weekends, breaks, etc. Meaning any free time I had was dedicated to him.

And that becomes exceedingly difficult when you’re trying to put down roots somewhere. You can’t just pick up and leave every weekend or else you’ll never feel settled. And then it comes to a point where you don’t want to pick up and leave every weekend because you’re settled.

I think if my boyfriend and I were truly forced to do long distance for more than say 3 months, it would put a lot of strain on our relationship. We are both people that like to go out and do things and dedicating our free time and weekends to a 5 hour drive is just unreasonable on both ends.

I give a lot of credit to the people that can do it and I hope their quality of life and relationship are still in a good place. I’m just not the kind of person who can live off bi-weekly interactions for years at a time. But I can’t knock it if it works for other people.

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27 thoughts on “Doing The Long Distance Relationship Thing

  1. I don’t think I can do long distance for an extended period of time. It just seems too difficult. My bf and I are moving upstate in March but he’ll be finish teaching the rest of the semester. So from March to mid-May we’re gonna be doing the long distance thing and I am already not looking forward to it. The only thing that will help is knowing there’s an end in sight. I can’t imagine doing long distance and not knowing when it’ll end.

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  2. I’ve done long distance before and trust me, it’s fun. But ultimately you need someone who’s closer to you. Someone you cuddle with. Some you can touch, feel, and know that that person is right next to you. You can invite them to parties, show them off to your friends and family, be proud you have them. No. I don’t think I can do a long distance relationship ever again.

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  3. Hope you and your boyfriend get reunited soon!! Long distance relationships are hard especially when they’re all the way on the other side of the world! Luckily mine isn’t like that but it’s still a plane ride over. When you’re together, you never want to part and I think that’s the toughest thing I face when I do go to visit. I would never be able to leave and drive hours away every single weekend though and I can see how that would really strain a relationship! But kudos to those that can do that:)

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  4. Hope it all works out for you but it is tough to be apart isn’t it? If its short-term then I can understand but long-term long-distance relationships seems little odd to me.

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  5. I tried long distance relationship not just once but twice and both incidents ended up a total mess. I’m just not cut out to not seeing my partner often. One of my top love languages is Quality Time and without that I feel like a relationship is incomplete. A temporary long distance relationship for a month doesn’t seem too bad, when he gets back you two will have a lot of catching up to do and that will make the past few weeks feel like they never happened 🙂

    MaKupsy :

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  6. Most of my life I told myself that I will never be in a long distance relationship. I have no idea what is wrong with me now because all of a sudden I am in one, for the first time in my life.
    I am terrified, because I do not even know what to do. I miss him literally every day, and cyber communication just does not see like it is enough. I am still hopeful for the best though because out of all my close distance relationships, the long distance one seems to be making me the happiest, because he makes so much more of an effort than anyone else has ever done.

    It is true this life is not for everyone, but it is not impossible.

    Check out my blog

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  7. Been in long distance relationship for a long time now. I can say that it’s not an easy ride,but my partner and I always make it to a point to always communicate and have time for each other even when we are thousand miles apart.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Men get their emotional needs met through physical contact, it is the nature of this beast. And your intuitive notion is correct about him… Nothing more than a month. Your intuition serves you well, so march on, brave one.


  9. Thanks for sharing this very honest post. It made me think of a past long distance relationship that was a very difficult experience do to the lack of face time.

    Liked by 1 person

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