Adulthood Burnout

I. am. tired. I’ve been in the full time workforce and fully into adulthood for about 4 years now and I’m completely burnt out from it all. And while I know job burnout is something a lot of us suffer from, I have adulthood burnout.

I have a lot of conversations with friends where we contemplate how it’s really possible that we have to work for the rest of our lives.

I think the worst part about it is just constantly staring into the future and thinking about how you have to live a certain way for so long. That you’ll never fully be able to live the life you want until you’re retired – which is like 45 years away for me. And you’re expected to just hit all these milestones in the meantime. Get married. Have kids. Get a promotion. And if you hit all those milestones then maybe your life will be interesting enough to get you to retirement.

But I don’t want to hit those milestones, they aren’t my goals. There’s nothing really killing time for me until retirement. And I’d love to be working to live and leaving my job, my responsibilities, my bills at the door every once in a while. But it’s just not realistic.

I’m so burnt out from just not being able to do what I want to do. Even if I had one more day in the weekend, I think I would feel a little better. But at the moment, adulthood is getting up early five times a week, getting home late to cook dinner, go to the gym, watch a tv show, and go to bed. Five. Days. A. Week.

It’s not even all about work, it’s just about the lack of freedom that comes with being an adult. Isn’t that what kids dream of? The day that they’re 18 and they can do whatever they want? Turns out it’s a dream for adults too. I’m sure retirement is quite the disappointment as well.

30 thoughts on “Adulthood Burnout

  1. Girl, I feel ya. Maybe try and change up your routine a bit. Having something to look forward to even in everyday/week life can brighten your spirits. I’m dreading waking up extra early for an event on Friday, but am excited that it means I get to leave early.

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  2. I was in similar situation. 💕 I recommend as many people as possible learn a skill and go self employed. Really do for more freedom. 💕 🌸 💕 🌸 💕 🌸 💕 🌸

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  3. All of those years as a child and teen we dream of being an adult and doing whatever we want to do. Then, when we arrive, the sad and challenging reality of life hits us in the face. Not easy or fun.

    I would suggest changes in routine. Preparing yourself for another job. A job with flex time that allows you to work four full days, allowing you to have three day weekends every weekend. The four full days will be hard, but the three days off weill give you more freedom.

    Wish you all the best.

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  4. As someone who retired from the same numbing job after 30 years–I feel everything you are saying. I’m still young, though (at 57), and I’m enjoying my life. In fact, we sold everything we worked so hard for during our younger years–all the ‘societal’ signs of success–and moved into a comfortable RV and travel full time (husband still works for a Fortune 500 company full time from wherever we may be). We are so brainwashed about what is expected of us to be comfortable, successful, and ‘normal,’ that it paints us in an unconscious, self-imposed corner where we think we have only one way out. Yes, we do need to be responsible and support ourselves and our families, but we can still prioritize what makes us feel fulfilled and happy. We chose travel and experiences over materialistic things and redefined our personal ‘success.’ We only regret waiting so long to do it. Travel is what makes US happy, but desires are different for everyone and 100% achievable if we want them bad enough. If you are feeling burned out and in a rut, maybe it’s time to redefine what’s important and add a lot more of ‘happy’ to your routine. I hope you find the ‘sweet spot’ where work is work, but your LIFE is full of things that bring you joy. I wish I’d done more of that while I was in your age range. It’s a trite cliche, but enjoying the JOURNEY (daily life) is just as important as reaping the rewards at the DESTINATION (fully reaching a goal). I hope your burn out doesn’t last long–treat yourself to something special because you 100% deserve it!

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  5. Rosie I know exactly how you feel! My friend and I discussed this same thing once since we don’t really see marriage and kids as goals we want to achieve. We found out the only next milestone before retirement to look forward to is menopause…which is just so great haha.
    But seriously, the monotony is really hard to deal with sometimes. It almost feels like I’m being punished. I would love it if jobs had some sort of way to incorporate summer and winter breaks (and honestly spring and fall breaks too). A long break to do what I want would be enough to refresh me I think.

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    1. Lmaooo menopause what a joy. I try to look forward to adopting more dogs lol A summer break would honestly make me feel like a whole new person, I wish every day that the schedules of a regular 9-5 would change.

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  6. Honestly this has alllllll the feels! When did life become sooo routine like? Going to work and coming home. I try to change things up and do classes or go to new places whenever I can but still I feel like shouldn’t there be more to life sometimes. 😂 definitely feel like we should get school holidays again hahah

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  7. I hope you & every one reading this, going through it, find something you truly love and are so passionate about that you love waking up and getting to it every day! All in time girl, I wish you the best!
    This funk is the absolute worst but pushing through it to where you’re supposed to be is so absolutely rewarding!
    xo Bri

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  8. Wow, I related to this post a lot. Thank you so much for being honest and open with all of this. I think SO many people go through adult burn out. It’s so discouraging and tiring at times. I’m 25 now and I feel a lot of pressure to fit in a certain role when that’s just not me! And work culture can be so toxic too. Right now, I’m just trying to really follow what my heart says and not listen to others. People are always going to judge regardless!! I truly hope that things start to change and you get through this burn out quickly. x

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  9. Well spoken. Don’t even mention when your routine includes kids, job, husband and the other 100 to-dos each day. Major burn out. It kills our adrenals. Our adrenals are ou driving force. Take care of them and eliminate the caffeine, sugar, eat a veggie fruit rich balanced diet and get plenty of rest. Wish someone had advised me as I’m advising people. Burn out is no joke. Sometimes your body is never the same after the adrenals has been through so much.

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  10. First off, don’t worry about the goals society says you should have, although I have a feeling you don’t!

    It seems like your date nights are a good step in fighting the monotony of life.

    I don’t know if you’ll find this helpful or cringe, but forever isn’t nearly as long as it seems. Someday, you’ll reach a point when you wonder how you got there!

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  11. Unfortunately that’s all part of grown-up life. You need to make more plans and do more in your valuable time off. Looking forward to mini-adventures and nights out etc is what makes the working week bearable.

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  12. I just turned 63 a week ago, I retired at 56 yrs 10 1/2 months before I turned 57. The only reason I was able to retire at all was because I physically broke down to such a bad degree that I was totally unable to work anymore. I never ever figured that I would be able to retire, I thought that I would simply die on the job. I don’t have to get up early 7 days a week like I always had to do before so that part is nice but I also can’t afford to do anything even if I had any health to do anything, which I don’t. I wish that I could give you some great advise but I just don’t know what it would be. I do wish you well though.

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  13. Yessss, I know this feeling. Am I happy in my life? Yes. but do I wish I could drop everything and travel more, SO MUCH YES. I guess part of that plays into me not being a risk taker, but the M-F, 8-5 routine is getting old and I’ve only been at it for 5 years. I miss college because we had breaks at least, I could totally go for a summer break!! Or even like you said just an extra weekend day!!

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  14. The biggest lie we’re told as a kid is that we can be whatever we want when we get older. Sure some actually get to do that. But most of us, are going to have to settle for a job and work it for the next 30-40 years. I am so with you on even just an extra day in the weekend. I have no idea how it was decided that it’s only 2 days for the weekend and 5 for the work week. I am too tired after work to do anything besides eat and shower. An extra day of having no work at all would be amazing!

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