I know that being in love with your best friend is a great feeling. I feel it every day. I feel it when we laugh at stupid things together, I feel it when we start singing the instrumentals in songs (poorly), I feel it when we comfort each other.
But nothing really compares to that falling in love for the first time feeling. And you can tell me alllllll you want about how you and your significant other still feel that warm and fuzzy about each other, but I won’t believe you.
Mostly because you have both been through some shit together. We all have. It’s nothing like your first date when you were so nervous you were shaking on the drive to the restaurant. It doesn’t compare to the cute texts or phone calls or letters you would send when you were still testing the waters to see if this would become a relationship.
What you feel now is nothing like the stomach drop when you first said I love you or the excitement of knowing you get to wake up with someone every day. It doesn’t compare to the I do at the altar.
Once you’ve been with someone for a while, that falling in love, first love feeling just becomes a memory. And I’ve had that feeling with a lot of different people, it’s a feeling I chased for a while when I hadn’t found the right person. It’s a feeling I still miss. I’d like to do it all over again with my boyfriend just to have that giddy feeling again.
It’s something that comes from innocence and from the unknown. It’s not a feeling that can stay with the relationship for a long time. While I still have those slo-mo movie moments where I’m like wow this means everything to me, it’s fleeting.
I think people will spend forever chasing that first love feeling. It’s a great feeling, but it’s really what follows that matters most.