Does Online Dating Lack Spontaneity?

Meet cute: a scene in film, television, etc. in which a future romantic couple meets for the first time in a way that is considered adorable, entertaining, or amusing.

Because I base so many of my falling-in-love fantasies off of love novels and star crossed movies, I’ve always pictured my moment with “the one” as a meet cute.

We’ve all watched at least one rom-com that has the lovely and broken girl falling into the arms of the protective and strong man. They bump into each other on the street and spill coffee on each other, he pulls over to help her fix her car, she finds his dog running away in the park, etc. etc.

Let’s talk online dating – on top of the possibility of the person not looking like their picture, being incredibly boring and awful, or just being a serial killer – does online dating take away the possibility of a meet cute? Does it take out all of the fun, danger, and excitement of running into someone in the gym and falling in love with each other as you both reach for the same water bottle?

I like the idea of online dating, because I like being able to get to know someone online before you spend your time with them in person.  But does it kill the magic, or does the built up tension until you finally meet make up for the fact that you didn’t fall in love in some overly romantic way?

Online dating is the now, more than 1/3 of relationships start online. And I can see why. As a millennial, I live in a ‘me’ generation and I don’t have a lot of time to waste on people who aren’t benefiting me.  So I could go on date after mediocre date with a person I made out with in a bar or a friend’s boyfriend’s friend.  Or I could scientifically matched up and bing bang boom – fall in love on the first coffee date.

Realistically – how many meet cutes even happen in the real world? Most people just meet with a uncomplicated introduction through friends or at school or when they’re on vacation, they stay in contact and then they date.  Then they fall in love and then they get married.  It’s simple. It’s pretty boring.

Did you meet your SO online? Was it romantic?

22 thoughts on “Does Online Dating Lack Spontaneity?

  1. I met my fiance online. It wasn’t a dating site, it was just a really bad social media site that we found each other on. We were friends for around 16 months before we finally met up in person. When we finally met it was the most amazing day of my life 🙂 it was so nerve wracking but so perfect and romantic all at the same time. He held my hand within minutes and our first kiss beats any with a guy I met offline. Don’t be scared of it, embrace it. Just be careful 🙂
    C.x

    Liked by 3 people

  2. I think you’re probably right that meet cutes are pretty thin on the ground in ordinary life. At the same time, I have done A LOT of internet dating and not found the scientific way particularly successful either. I met so many guys who were great on paper and I just really didn’t click with in person. So that’s not a yes or a no from me. If you do give it a go, though, one thing i will guarantee: plenty of stories to keep your girl friends entertained!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh yes. It takes away the magic for me. So transactional and very easy to not care about. But that’s speaking from the perspective of it not working for me so far. I imagine there are awesome moments when two online daters meet for the first time and feel that awesome connection, making the rest history.

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  4. I met my husband on a dating site called OkCupid 7 years ago. We have been married for almost 3.5 years now. Love stories really do exist, maybe not as spontaneous, but they are just as real online as they are offline. As for dating, I have met jerks both online and in the offline world. I cannot say that one method of dating is better than the other, but for me personally, it’s much easier to express myself through my writing than it is in person. 😇 I don’t have time to get to know someone, become friends with them for the next year or two or three, and go on dates with them. I’m spontaneous in the sense that I jumped right into dating when I met my now husband and I regret nothing ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I did! It was so unlike both of us to go online… but we both did within a few days of each other. I emailed him because he was the only man that “liked” my profile but did not leave me a message. I can see that occurrence playing out in the super private person that he is. We were two people that went to work and home each day… not bar scene folks. I tried friends of friends…. that was terrible. My friends have terrible friends for dating. It was very spontaneous for both of us… and paid off big time! He is still amazing, even after 5 years of marriage. We are in our 50’s. Maybe that is the difference… spontaneity has a different definition for us.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. My ex and I met on-line and I don’t think it takes away from a meet cute. The problem is that many people in my generation (40-50) are tired that we don’t ever seem to meet when we live near each other at libraries, grocery stores or the gas station. It’s the life we have now. Ugh!

    Liked by 1 person

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