I’m Terrified Of Getting Old

This may be a weird thing to admit, but when I was younger I always had a hard time picturing my future. Like I never thought I’d make it this far. Maybe I’d die young and leave a bittersweet memory, maybe I’d just vanish.

But here I am, about to be 27 years old, with no signs of stopping.

Most kids I knew in high school had a plan. And it looks like a lot of them are sticking to that plan. They wanted to go to college, they wanted to get a good job and get married and have kids and live happily ever after.

I didn’t really want to go to college. It was just something I felt I had to do. I didn’t really care if I got a good job and up until I got in a relationship, I didn’t want a family and kids (and now, I don’t want a family and kids again).

I’m terrified of getting old, I just don’t feel ready for it. Sometimes I sit and think about how my parents must feel looking at me and my sisters now, all grown up, and wondering where the time went. I feel that way just looking back at college. Where did the time go? Where did the freedom go?

I see tiny aspects of age in my life now, wear on my face and a struggle to lose weight. Stress every day. And can’t imagine what I’m going to look like in 10 years, how I’m going to feel. I don’t even know how I got to where I am now and I don’t know what the future looks like at all.

I still have the high school outlook, I’m just doing things because I’m supposed to be doing them. Then you get old. Then you die.

I wish I had more of an idea of what the future holds. As on overthinker, I know I worry far too much about it. But it’s just always something that’s in the back of my mind, especially when my birthday nears!

15 thoughts on “I’m Terrified Of Getting Old

  1. I think we all go through this at some level. I never imagined myself getting old, ever. I honestly thought I would die young. Now I am 50 and look back thinking how did I get here? Every step was looking back. College, spouse, and kids. They cannot be old enough for college because wasn’t I just there?

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  2. Rosie…as someone who is about to turn 43, let me reassure you getting old is a blessing. Sure I am starting to get wrinkles, age spots and gray hair but I think that is a sign that I have been living a good life.
    Just enjoy how you are now and don’t worry about how you will be when you’re my age.

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  3. I sometimes wonder how old age will treat me, like what to expect, how life will be, the highs and lows. It’s intriguing to say the least. I try to take it decade by decade now, especially since I’ll be closing out my 20s soon. 😬

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  4. I’m the opposite. I spent my 20s looking forward to my 30s. Now I’m 30 and loving it! I look forward to the years ahead. I was definitely one of those people with a plan, but it doesn’t involve husbands and children. 🙃

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  5. I admit I have fewer years ahead of me and more years behind me. The key I guess is to live the best life you can and focus on doing things that make life worthwhile. Don’t borrow trouble Rosie because there is too much of it to go around.

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  6. I feel this too. When I turned 20 I remember being so scared of the decade ahead of me. I felt like I had to check everything off of my bucketlist because time was slipping away from me so quickly. I’m about to turn 27 too and I’m trying not to freak out about approaching 30! I think it’s okay to be scared of aging while still knowing that it’s a huge blessing to get to experience it.

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  7. Oh, please don’t be terrified. It is lovely to be just a bit older to know who you are and what you really need to be happy. I’m an old introvert, and now I am able to build my life in the way that makes me happy. I am 43 and love every moment of my full grown up life. And believe me, you will look gorgeous when you are older. People just age different nowadays, much slowlier than their predecessors.

    Liked by 1 person

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