When we moved to New Hampshire, our apartment building had a gym in it. It was just two floors down from our apartment and we thought we hit the jackpot. But it was a small gym – a few cardio machines and free weights. It was pretty crowded and during COVID I didn’t feel comfortable being in there with more than one other person.
Having that small gym honestly made me lazy. I was able to make a lot of excuses like someone was hogging the weights so I just did a mile on the treadmill. And while I was lucky to have a gym open during the beginnings of the pandemic, it was just another excuse not to go. I slowly stopped going.
It hasn’t really been a year since I’ve been to the gym, but it has been a while since I pushed myself during a work out.
I signed up for a gym in NJ and was so very sore after my first few work outs. And I was soon reminded why I didn’t like going to the gym in the first place – the guilt and pressure I put on myself when I don’t go.
I complain all the time about my weight and people always say go to the gym more. Well it’s just not something I enjoy and I try my best. But my best is never good enough, especially for me.
I have to keep reminding myself that I’m starting all over. It’s okay to only go once or twice a week. I don’t need to go for hours at a time. It’s okay to start slow, do what my body can do, and try my best to be healthy.