I threw tradition out the window a long, long time ago. Our engagement was anything but traditional. No down on one knee, no surprise, no diamond that would put us in massive debt. I wanted to do it our way, on our terms.
I just don’t care about other people’s opinions anymore. I truly don’t want to hear it. Our relationship is about no one other than ourselves, that’s the hard truth. It’s a little selfish and I’ll admit that, but the more people I let into that bubble, the more negativity that enters too.
Lots and lots of our friends are getting married right now, and their weddings are lots of fun and they look so beautiful and happy. But I’ve been a bridesmaid and I’ve been a guest and BOTH are stressful enough for me! Planning as soon as the ring slips on your finger, the absolutely insane costs of weddings these days (the average cost of a wedding in the US was $28,000 in 2019), the long hours of getting ready, having to dedicate your day to thanking friends and family for coming and making sure everything is going smoothly…it’s all just too much for me.
The cost alone is enough for me to say no thanks. Especially when you don’t even get to sit down and eat for the plates you’re paying for. And so many of the decisions made for your wedding don’t even end up being your own. 20 added guests because it’s your parents that are paying for it, settling for a location that’s more convenient to your guests, etc. etc.
So we plan on eloping because I just don’t want to plan at all at the end of the day. And I just want our wedding and our marriage to be ours. I’ll rent a dress, he’ll dress casually, we’ll go to the courthouse.
And hopefully we’ll be able to throw a big backyard party to celebrate, but it will be on our terms and as low-pressure as possible.