Can You Date Someone With The Same Name As Your Ex?

I once ran into the problem of whether or not I could date someone who had the same name as my dad. I googled it, read many blogs on the subject, and then realized how silly that was. If I really liked someone – why did it matter what their name was? Also I have never in my life called my dad by his first name so it really wouldn’t be a reminder to me of anything. I never went on a date with the guy anyway, but at least I know for the future.

Another time, I ran into the problem on whether or not I could date someone who had the same name as my ex.

There’s a lot more attached to the name of someone I used to date than there is to a friend or a family member who I don’t even call by that name.  It seems crazy that something so little and pretty irrelevant could make such an impact on the decision to date someone.

Firstly, it’s a little weird just to have a boyfriend with the same name as your ex. Secondly, your friends are going to get so confused when you start talking about your new boyfriend.  Can you imagine the look on their faces when they’re listening to you and think you’re telling a story about the ex whose photos you burned together on the porch? And lastly, you just have so many memories attached to that name. And they’re probably not good ones. If they are good ones, you’re probably not even over your ex and then this kind of just sounds like an odd replacement for you.

It all depends on how long you dated the person for and how much they mean to you now.

Would I date someone who has the same name as the ex I dated for four years? No. That seems a little drastic, but he also broke my heart and ruined a good portion of my life. I don’t want to jinx myself somehow and potentially go down that road again. Unless I could call him some kind of variation of the name, it probably wouldn’t work out.

Would I date someone who has the same name as the guy I dated for three months but never actually committed to? Yes, I think so.  Because I honestly forgot about 90% of our “relationship” and even though the parts I remember are still bad, I don’t care enough about that ex or that name to turn down someone new just because they have the same name.

It seems silly, until you’re put into that position. Would you date someone with the same name as your ex?

43 thoughts on “Can You Date Someone With The Same Name As Your Ex?

      1. I currently am and in all honesty, if you meet a great person, totally different, new person, who has nothing to do with your ex, but unfortunately happens to have the same name, how silly and irrational it is to refuse seeing him? Its just a name. I date people based on their personality. What if you miss the love of your life just because of a name?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. so true! It’s really all up to you on how comfortable you were with the break up and if you can move forward without any memories being attached to the name, but it really is just a name.


  1. My ex of 6 months (we ended two months ago) is with another girl with my name….that’s weird right?

    Like I don’t think I could do that so soon. After maybe 4 years I could be with another guy with his name… depending on if we still had some sort of friendship or not. But that’s pretty soon right, I’m freaked out about it.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It’s definitely something I would have a hard time getting past, like how are you not reminded of your ex when you say their name? Maybe it makes it easier, less names to confuse haha but I don’t think I’d be able to do it.


  2. How about dating a guy with the same name as the father of your children, whom is still in your life? I intentionally avoid men with any name close to his. I somehow ended up meeting someone on a dating and didn’t find out his name until we started texting, it wasn’t the exact same but they had the same prefix… it lasted 3 weeks…

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m dealing with a similar thing right now. My ex has the same name (and name variation) as a really great guy I’m currently talking to. It’s been a while since that relationship and I feel healed from the experience, but it still strikes me as strange. I’ll have to give it a chance cause he seems awesome, but we’ll see.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I am going through this right now. I was in a very intense relationship of two and a half years and I ended it with the guy very much against his wishes; it ended quite badly and I was actually worried about his state of mind. I no sooner had time to breathe that I found out he took up with a new woman who has my same exact name spelled the same exact way. And it’s not a common name. I don’t know what to make of it. He never came out and told me about it either, I found out on social media lol. Needless to say, I’m over here scratching my head. Can it really be a coincidence?

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  5. I’m currently dating a girl with the same name of my ex GF with whom I’ve been together for four years. At the beginning, I felt awkward. Same tone, modulations of the voice when I called her and it was, to me, like a jump in the past. With friends and family I always referred to the girl I’m dating like “the NEW one” and my ex like “the previous one”. But we are dating for two months and she’s so great to me and kind, and our relationaship goes too well and “whatever her name is…”, she’s been good to me.

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  6. I feel like it depends on how you ended your relationship with your ex, for example if you had a big painful breakup that you still think about daily, it might be hard to move past! However, time heals all wounds, and so I think eventually you would get used to dating someone with the same name as your ex and you wouldn’t attach their name to your ex anymore! I would hate to miss out on someone great over something so silly as a name!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’ve dated 3 guys named Matthew before, about 3 or 4 years apart. I thought it would be weird at first, but it actually wasn’t. 😂 That was probably because none of them were anything serious. Maybe if I had a serious relationship with at least one of them, it would have been different.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Honestly, I would not even date a man with my dad’s name… that’s so weird & absolutely, definitely not someone with the name of my 4 year ex either! It may sound silly but, it’s really actually kind of important lol.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Ah, true. My cousins & I were really close growing up so for me, that wouldn’t work out, either but, since you don’t really relate to yours that makes sense that it wouldn’t really matter!

        Liked by 1 person

  9. It would be hard. But to think that I’m not trying to date a person just because the name is exactly the same also sounds a little stupid. But even if stupid, I don’t think there’s any other way than to tell the person that nothing could be done. It’s the way it is.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Funny enough, most of my exes have names that aren’t very common in Canada – Eastern Euopean or Punjabi names. However, one of my exes’ name is Nick and I dated a guy who was also called Nick. It’s funny I didn’t even really think about it until now, but since they were so different and we broke up almost 20 years ago, I don’t think it would matter. Now if it’s within 5-8 years, it would probably be a little weird. I’d still go for it if there was a connection though.

    Liked by 1 person

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