Do People Change?

I often see the worst in people. So when someone tells me they will change, I barely believe them. This is partly because I don’t want to be disappointed and partly because most of the time, they don’t change.

I think there are the parts of us that make us who we are and those are the parts no one should ever ask you to change. Whether it be your friends, a significant other, or family. They can’t ask you to change, but they shouldn’t be forced to deal with something they don’t like. So you can try to change for your significant other or you can let the relationship go.

If you’re asking someone to change and they’re unwilling or can’t see why they need to change, then it will never happen. You’re putting all your eggs in a basket that’s ready to fall apart.

If they can see the change that needs to be made, they may have a greater chance at actually making that change. But most of the time, relationship problems come from the core of someone. It comes from a part of their personality that has been there for years, something that is deep rooted. Can people really change those parts of themselves?

It all depends on your want or need to change and the recognition of the problem. I’m sure people can change, I just rarely see it.

hc
Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/kerenzayuen/

The Hookup On: Old Posts & Thanksgiving

I hope everyone had a fantastic Thanksgiving! I am traveling this week and unable to post a lot, so I thought I’d link back to some old posts I still love for you to check out while I’m gone! ๐Ÿ™‚ If you have a post you want to share, feel free to drop it in the comments!

  1. 5 Little Reasons To Be Thankful
  2. 5 Ways To Help Others This Season
  3. The Importance Of Self Care
  4. Travel Realistically In Your 20’s
  5. I Want To Be Alone But I Don’t Want To Be Alone
  6. Getting Hurt Vs. Hurting Someone

Updated Fall Bucket List

Fall is hereeeee, especially now because the weather isn’t 80 degrees anymore. I love Tim Burton movies and Halloween and flannels and beanies and concert season so I’m pretty excited about this. Here is what I’m planning to get done and what I’ve done so far, I made a few changes because some of the goals I set ended up being wayyyyyyyy out of reach so here’s a new, improved, and updated fall bucket list! Did you know winter doesn’t officially start until December 21st? That seems so weird to me.ย Whatโ€™s one thing you want to do this fall?

  1. Go apple picking
  2. Make apple sauce
  3. Go pumpkin picking
  4. Visit 3 out of state locations
  5. Go hiking in 2 places
  6. Make plans with my friends!
  7. 6,200 Instagram followers
  8. 2,000 WordPress followers
  9. Go to 2 concerts
  10. Downsize the amount of stuff I have
  11. Go to Storm King
  12. Read half of the Vampire Academy series
  13. Finish a knitting project
  14. Get back into shape

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Dealing With Disappointment

People are going to disappoint you in life, it’s just going to happen. They’re going to lie to you, lead you on, put in less effort, hurt you, or pretend to be someone they’re not.

You’re going to disappoint yourself in life, it’s just going to happen. You’re going to make the wrong decision, you’re not going to speak out when you should, you’re going to lie or hurt someone or be someone you’re not.

The only way to deal with it is to analyze the situation and decide whether it deserves your forgiveness or not. Because not everyone will. And dropping them from your life might be hard, but necessary. And some people do deserve your forgiveness. It might be hard to give it to them. It might be hard to forgive yourself.

The hard times in life end up being the times where decisions are made that can better your life. When someone disappoints you, only weigh your feelings on the matter. No one can tell you or convince you how to feel. Then take those feelings and make the best decision for yourself.

Disappointment hurts, there’s no way around it. But in these time, put yourself first and be a little selfish. You’re the one who hurts, so you are allowed to decide how to make yourself feel better.

hc
Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/babyowls/

You’re Improving More Than You Think

Sometimes I feel like I’m going nowhere. I feel stuck in the same place and the constant need to do more, be more, see more. And I know a lot of people can relate. It sucks to feel like you’re not progressing.

But you are.

Last year, I made a 2016 fall bucket list and checked off many of the items happily. This year, I did the same and kind of feel underwhelmed by my activities and my goals. I feel like I can’t reach them and I feel like it’s just a repeat of last year.

But it’s not.

Every year, every day, no matter who you are, we are growing and learning and improving upon ourselves. Last year I had a goal to reach 2,200 Instagram followers. This year the goal is 6,500 Instagram followers. I’ve grown 4,000 followers in the past year and I worked really hard and felt really great when I was hitting those small strides. I forgot to stop and congratulate myself.

I just keep chugging along without stopping to look back and see my improvements and how much I’ve grown. And that kind of becomes a depressing way of life. Even though I’m setting these goals, nothing is driving me to finish them anymore.

I don’t want to finish them anymore because I never stop to reward myself for the things I’ve done. I check it off the list then create another goal. But why did I go through all that work? Why wouldn’t I want to celebrate? Because when you don’t stop to recognize your achievements, you think you’re not improving. But you are, we all are. We just need to take a moment and pat ourselves on the back.

hc
Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/jjpacres/

3 Year Blogiversary

Happy blogiversary to me – Rosie Culture turns 3!

I recently hit over 2,000 WordPress followers and did a Q&A on behalf of that, you can read it here. I would just like to take the opportunity to thank everyone again for engaging and welcoming me into the blogging community.

I started this blog as a school project and it was all about relationships and initially called Hookup Culture. When I started it, I was a pretty bitter college student who didn’t believe in love anymore after my four year relationship ended horribly. A lot has changed since then. But if you told me then that that silly little blog about one night stands would turn into a passion for blogging and becoming an influencer on social media, I would not have believed you.

The more it grew, the more I found a voice for this blog and the more I grew more comfortable with myself.

There are a few bloggers here that have been with me since the beginning, since I was writing about Tinder, bad dates, and not believing in relationships. Some have come and gone. Any new followers probably know me as a more hopeful, yet still troubled 20-something year old.

I’m happy to have the old and the new and for us to all grow together. Here’s to 3 years and many more! ๐Ÿ™‚

xoxo

Rosie

Stepping Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Sometimes the only way to do the things that need to get done to be happy is by stepping out of your comfort zone. And I don’t think we often think about that as a way to happiness. Because I know for me, stepping out of my comfort zone gives me anxiety and makes me feel absolutely horrible. But the reward for doing so could be the happiness I’m missing.

There are so many things that we don’t do, but kind of want to do, because it doesn’t feel comfortable to us. We don’t go places alone, we don’t try new foods, we don’t go new places. Because we’re afraid of being alone, uneasy about eating something weird, and scared of being somewhere unfamiliar.

But if you have no one to go with to see your favorite band, will you go alone or not go at all? Are you missing out on something that will potentially be fun, your new favorite place, your new favorite food, or hobby?

Even if it’s a little painful, sometimes we have to take the risks to get the reward. Sometimes you have to force and claw your way out of your comfort zone, because you might find happiness there.

Capture
Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/spapax/