Mid-relationship Crisis

A mid-life crisis is an emotional crisis of identity and self-confidence that can occur in early middle age. So I think that would make a mid-relationship crisis an emotional crisis of identity and self-confidence that can occur in early mid-relationship.

And shout out to whoever googled the term “mid-relationship crisis” and somehow got to my blog and inspired this blog idea.

I think it’s very easy to have an identity crisis in a relationship. Before I started dating my current boyfriend, I had been single for years and even living by myself. I had become very independent, which isn’t quite like me, but I enjoyed it. But then we started dating and mostly everything became about us.

It’s not a bad thing to invest your time and emotions in someone else and of course the beginning of a relationship will be so happy and sweet you won’t want to tear yourself away from it. But as the relationship progresses, you may begin to lose your independence. You may be giving up parts of yourself and you might not even notice. And these things are mostly because you allowed yourself to do it, not because your partner forced you to.

All of a sudden, you realize you barely see or talk to your friends anymore because your significant other kind of satisfies the role of a friend. And you stop making the gym and eating healthy a priority because it’s so fun to come home and chill on the couch with snacks and your boyfriend. You stop putting in a lot of effort towards how you look because you see the same people every day anyway, why does it matter?

They are little things that can build up and cause an identity crisis which can cause a mid-relationship crisis and make you think you need to call it quits for everything in your life to be better again. But that’s not always the case.

You can be independent in a relationship and even if you lose it for a little while, you can always get it back. Everyone at some point freaks out about their relationship whether it’s the commitment, longevity, fear of losing someone, etc. Assess your own happiness and decide whether this crisis really needs drastic measures or just a step back into your old comfort zone.

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September Recap

I liked September, but I’m glad it’s over. My busy season at work starts in October and I feel like September is just filled with anticipation, I’d rather just dive right in. But, I’m excited for Halloween movies and fall activities so bring it on October! 🙂

Favorite show: The Good Place.

Favorite memory: Going to New Hampshire with my boyfriend and our dog!

Favorite place: Littleton, New Hampshire. Cutest town EVER! They have a covered bridge here that looks like it’s straight from a Bob Ross painting.

Favorite meal: The only thing I crave lately is mochi.

Favorite Instagram: We have a tradition to go apple picking and watch spooky movies every year!

Favorite Tweet: Can I take another spa day now?

Favorite book: Emergent, I got this book from the dollar store and liked it because I love cheesy YA books lol.

Favorite blog post: Do you believe in soulmates?

Favorite collaboration: This post on the importance of Sexual Health! Get checked!

Tell me one memory you have from September in the comments below!

What You Don’t Know About Overthinkers

A lot of people say they’re an overthinker, kind of like the way people casually and incorrectly say they have OCD. Like you may think a lot, but do you truly know what an overthinker goes through?

I’m pretty introverted and socially awkward – I have not always been this way, but it’s something I was shaped into as I got older. I’m pretty weird and that was all fine and fun when I was young and then as I got older we were all pressured into being “cooler” and that’s when I think I became my most uncomfortable with myself and started overthinking.

So, I can sort of remember what it was like to not worry about absolutely everything and I have something to compare it to.

What you may not know about overthinkers is we think all the time – but all. the. time. I think when I wake up in the morning, my work gets interrupted in the day by overthinking, my dreams even keep me up at night because my brain doesn’t shut off. And this thinking can keep us from actually doing. Because we play out so many scenarios and think things to death so much that it just stops us in our tracks.

For most of my college career I avoided seriously dating because it put my thinking into overload and caused too much stress. I would break off relationships before they even started because of the panic that overthinking would cause to come over me.

When I have too much to do, I think about it all day. I make lists and lists and can’t focus on the impending doom that’s coming my way.

You may look at someone and say, “oh you just think too much!” But it’s not as simple as meditating in the morning and wiping your thoughts away. Actually, I can’t enjoy meditation or yoga because the thoughts STILL creep in. There are worry warts, dramatic people, perfectionists – and then there are overthinkers whose minds actually never turn off.

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Completed Summer Bucket List

I always say summer is my favorite season, then fall rolls around and I’m like YESSSSS GIVE ME ALL THE SPOOKY STUFF!!!!  Anyway, it’s also my busiest season at work so my next bucket list won’t be too extensive. Check out what I got done this summer! Are you excited for fall?

  1. Read 5 books
  2. Have a picnic
  3. Visit Longwood Gardens
  4. Travel out of state 5 times
  5. Go to a concert
  6. Go to the beach at least once a month
  7. Reach 1,200 Twitter followers
  8. Reach 6,800 Instagram followers
  9. Reach 2,900 WordPress followers
  10. Reach 650 Facebook likes
  11. Finish my photo album
    This is definitely a better item for fall or winter!
  12. Meet up with friends at least twice a month
  13. Host a game night
  14. Eat vegan once a week
  15. Go to the gym at least twice a week
  16. Plan a trip for 2 year anniversary
    New Hampshire in September 🙂
  17. Change my hair
  18. Put more money into savings
  19. Make a wreath
  20. Make better choices when it comes to accepting sponsored posts
  21. See fireworks
  22. Watch 10 sunsets
  23. Take a walk with my boyfriend once a week

I Don’t Believe In Soulmates

My high school boyfriend and I once laid in the grass on a baseball field at night looking up at the stars and he told me I was his soulmate…..gag.

I don’t believe in there being only one person out there for you. That there is one person that your soul is destined for and you better find them or you’re just screwed.

I am very happy in the relationship I’m in, but if for some reason we broke up, I’d be able to move on. I could get someone to date me – but they might not necessarily be right for me.

Because what are the chances that my soulmate was waiting for me right here in New Jersey where I’ve been here all along? That out of allllll the people in the world, your soulmate was just right in front of you at your gym, your college, your high school. There are so many people in the world, so many people that could be a good potential match for you.

But if you find someone you like, who you have common interests with, who treats you right and is in the right place at the right time – you can make them your soulmate. The gods didn’t put you together, there is no invisible string in the universe that attaches you. We make it work with the people that work. Timing, effort, and compatibility are extremely important when it comes to the person you’re going to spend your life with. It’s not fate, you just met someone who you enjoy spending time with and you fought to stay with them.

I don’t believe in soulmates, but I believe in love. I believe that if it’s meant to be, it will be and if it doesn’t work out, there’s probably a good reason for it. Do you believe in soulmates?

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Social Media Pages

I am REALLY close to reaching my summer social media goals. I’d looooove for anyone who enjoys my blog to also follow me on social media.

Feel free to drop your handles below!

Reached my goal 🙂 Instagram: @rosieculture
20 likes away! Facebook: facebook.com/rosieculture
57 follows away! Twitter: @rosieculture

And 45 follows away from my goal on WordPress! Please share if you feel inclined, I’d love to hit at least one more of my goals. And drop your links below too to share with my audience! 🙂

The Hookup On: Sexual Health Awareness Month

This is a sponsored post. All opinions are mine.

If you’ve been following my blog long enough, you’ll know that my blog name used to be Hookup Culture. I primarily wrote about relationships and the single life and I still incorporate those topics into my writing today. September is Sexual Health Awareness Month and while I’ve talked a lot about dating and doing your own thing, I haven’t talked a lot about safety.

I have no judgement when it comes to how you choose to live your romantic life, but I will judge you a little bit if you decide not to take care of your health. The fact is, getting checked for STD’s should be as normal and common as getting a physical or going to the dentist. It’s just another part of your health that you need to take care of.

There is a stigma around it, though. As if getting tested means admitting that you’re dirty or you sleep around too much. But whether it’s 1 or 100 partners, you should get tested and you should mind your health. Ignore that very dumb and very outdated stigma because there is nothing wrong with making sure your body is 100%.

But I know that it can be awkward in the doctor’s office to go through this process. There are other options like STDCheck.com. At STD Check, you only need to visit a lab for a blood and urine sample and then you’re emailed your results in 1-2 days.

STD’s don’t just happen to young people or old people, they don’t just happen to people who have slept around, and they aren’t something that you want to ignore. This September, please keep your health a priority and get checked.

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