Friendships in Your 20’s

One thing no one prepared me for was how different friendships become after you leave college. In college, you live with your best friends. You eat with them, go everywhere with them, you rely on them like family. Then *poof* graduation comes and you all have to separate.

It’s hard to get on the same schedule after that. It’s hard to see each other, make commitments to each other, and stay in touch. It’s hard to keep that family type of feeling alive because you’re relying on other people now.

It kind of feels like things start to fall apart because you were so used to knowing everything about someone and now you only get to see them once a month. Friend dynamics change. You make new ones, old ones fall off the map, and some friendships start to take priority over others.

Effort is required on both ends to keep a friendship going and it’s frustrating when you don’t live near each other and more effort is being put in on one side and none on the other. I think friendships in your 20’s means sometimes we just have friends who are there for a good time, not the hard times. And we can’t put all our care into those friendships anymore.

It’s fine to keep those people around for the good times, but we can’t get upset when they don’t reciprocate the care we show. Then there truly are friends who are in it for the long haul. Friends who you only see once every 3 months, only text once a month, who you can still turn to at the end of a long day even though it feels like you’ve been strangers for a while.

Friendships in your 20’s is all about putting yourself and those who care first and leaving the rest as a secondary thought. We’re growing up, we can’t put all our time and energy into people who don’t do the same for us. It’s sad, but it’s time to move on.

Capture
Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/emilio_k/

When A Bad Day Gets Worse

Yes, I know, when it rains, it pours. But recently for me it feels more like when it rains, it monsoons.

There’s so much advice thrown around on days like this. A lot of “it will get better!” and “think positively!“. But my advice to you on a day like this is to just accept how much it sucks. Because it does suck and you’re allowed to just have a terrible day and wallow in how terrible it is.

Should that attitude last forever? No. And it will get better and if you continue to think negatively then it will negatively impact your life. But for today, everything sucks and everyone can shut up.

When a bad day gets worse, it’s best to just accept how truly bad it is and just laugh at how much has gone wrong. I’m not usually laughing in a oh-this-day-was-so-funny kind of way but more of a my-life-is-a-complete-joke kind of way and that’s just fine. Deal with it how you have to deal with it. If that’s with a bowl of queso or two or a glass of wine or five then DO IT.

You’re allowed to have bad days and just let them be bad. We’re human and this week totally sucks.

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Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/artetetra/

My Updated Winter Bucket List

As anticipated, winter is moving by slowly. We still have well over a month left before Spring comes and I can be hopeful for summer. I was sick of the cold the day it started. I’ve gotten some things done on my winter bucket list and I think I can actually finish it if I can hit my social media goals!

  1. Go to Terceira Island!
    Read about it here
  2. Finish 2 books
  3. Learn to knit/crochet a blanket
  4. Go somewhere by myself
  5. Find a new apartment
  6. Move out
  7. Become a better runner
  8. 6,500 Instagram followers
  9. 2,500 WordPress followers
  10. 1,000 Twitter followers
  11. Plan a weekend trip
    We’re going to Orlando in March!
  12. Become more present

What’s one thing you’ve accomplished this winter?

Stop Being Mad At Yourself

I haven’t been able to get myself to the gym more than once a week lately and I always feel guilty about it. But there are times when you want to go to the gym and you’re too lazy and then there are times you just don’t want to go. And I just don’t feel up to going.

And some days I eat a lot more than I should or eat things that really aren’t good for me. And I feel bad about myself even though I was just listening to what my body wants.

I just want to stop being mad at myself about these things.

Being mad at yourself isn’t going to change anything, it’s just going to motivate you less. It will just lower your self-esteem until you can’t even get out of bed or until you’re loading your plate with junk food.

Didn’t meditate today? It’s okay. Didn’t go to the gym today, yesterday, or the day before that? It’s okay. Ate a whole pizza today? It’s okay. Slept in and had an unproductive day? It’s okay.

We can’t be mad at ourselves for listening to what our bodies want. If you can’t get yourself to the gym or you keep napping after work  – it’s probably because you need it. But if you’re ignoring your body and going to the gym anyway or ignoring your body’s pleas to get active – that’s not okay.

But just stop being mad at yourself for these tiny things that just aren’t going to make a big impact on your life. There’s no reason to be so hard on yourself.

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Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/sthtodo/

Check Out My Social Media

February is my busy month at work – yikes. So catch up with me on social media while you’re waiting for me to get some inspiration and energy to write! If you follow my bucket lists, you’ll know I usually have social media goals set for myself. I’m 100 followers away from my goal on Instagram and 256 followers away from my Twitter goal.

Please drop your social media links in the comments so we can all check you out! 🙂

Instagram: @rosieculture
Facebook: facebook.com/rosieculture
Twitter: @rosieculture

A Recap Of The Places I’ve Lived In My Twenties

I think I am the exception to most people my age, but since graduating college I will have lived in 5 different places. I graduated at 22 and am now 24 to put things in context for you. That’s 5 places in 2 and a half years and you can bet they were all life lessons.

When I graduated from college, I convinced my parents to let me stay at the house I’d been living in the past two years of college because I got an internship sort of nearby. College campuses in the summer are a whole new type of weird I can’t even explain and they are also very empty. I spent a lot of time living between different houses and traveling a long ways to work. When the internship ended, I moved home and got a job there.

Living at home is definitely something I know a lot of people can relate to. It’s like you automatically revert back  to your 16 year old self when living with your parents. My parents had moved out of my childhood home when I was in college, so this was pretty strange for me. I didn’t really have my own room that was truly mine with any space for my stuff. I saved a lot of money, but my job was very basic and my parents were driving me nuts. So 6 months after I moved in, I got a new job and moved out.

I was in a rush and on a deadline, so I moved into a house with 3 other roommates. They were all strangers and they continued to be strangers the 10 months I lived there. I’m not very outgoing and everyone was on different schedules and were different ages. I spent most of the time in my room or tip toeing to the bathroom and kitchen. I really thought it was going to be super temporary, but I stayed there for almost a year until it became just too weird for me.

So, I moved out again. This time into a single apartment with a small kitchenette attached to the living room. I was paying for everything myself so I didn’t buy cable/wifi and I also didn’t have a freezer or oven. I’m coming up on a year at this apartment and it’s kind of amazing that I lived without things that a lot of people consider necessities. While I loved the apartment, it was time to take a next step and move in with my boyfriend.

In a few weeks we’ll be moving into a two bedroom, two bathroom apartment with a loft that I’m obsessed with. After this, I really hope to stay put for a while because anyone who has moved a lot knows that moving in and out is not fun. At all.

hc
Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/hmoong/

5 Don’ts For When You’re Traveling

1. Don’t forget a back up plan

Even trips where you’re winging it require some kind of plan. You never know when the bus you bought tickets for will get delayed and leave you with no ride to the airport (cough, cough, Greyhound).

2. Don’t overpack

Carry ons are really all you need. I usually bring a few pieces I can swap around and create new outfits out of.

3. Don’t forget the do not disturb sign

I don’t know about you guys, but the one thing I hate about hotels is always being intruded on – which is why I prefer airbnb’s. Someone is always knocking to clean or calling to ask something and I just want to be alone!

4. Don’t glue yourself to your phone

My favorite part about going out of the country is only having wifi when I’m chilling in the hotel. I don’t really preach putting your phone down often, but it’s nice when you’re on vacation to enjoy the moment and the people you’re with.

5. Don’t take pictures of everything

Yes, everything is amazing and DO take photos. I have a pretty bad memory so I can usually look back at one photo and get an amazing reminder of a whole day. But you don’t want to travel through a lens. There are plenty of things to do that aren’t instagram worthy or that you can just keep for yourself.

Let me know your tips below!

hc
Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/grapefruitbrains/