It’s Not Always 50/50

I recently read some Twitter wisdom that really stuck with me. When it comes to relationships, everyday won’t be 50/50. Some days will, but some days all he will have is 10 and you gotta give 90 but it’s okay. Because some days all you’ll have is 10 and he’ll give 90.

I rarely feel like my relationship is 50/50 and it’s the weight of my end that I can’t carry. It makes me feel so guilty to think that I put so much on boyfriend daily. I struggle with basic tasks when my anxiety strikes, I’ve always been a little selfish because of what I’ve been through in my past, and I’m undeniably lazy.

But that’s my point of view. If you asked him, he’d name all the things I do for him. He’d count out all the days where I’ve given 80 when he’s only had 20. And maybe my bad days outweigh his, but I definitely do give sometimes. Even though it’s hard for me to give.

It’s about sacrifice, it’s about give and take. Relationships aren’t always 50/50 and they aren’t always easy. It requires work and effort to keep a relationship blooming and happy. When you get comfortable, it’s easy to lose sight of the effort you really need to be putting in to ensure your partner is happy. When you both resort to scrolling through your phones all night after work instead of having a conversation over dinner, it’s time to realize what you’re putting in and what more you can be doing.

How others see your relationship, how your partner sees your relationship, and how you see your relationship can all be very different. Which is why communication is important and why we all need to pick up the slack sometimes.

January Recap

Favorite show: Derry Girls

Favorite memory: Ringing in the New Year with my friends and moving to New Hampshire!

Favorite place: New Hampshire 🙂

Favorite meal: We’ve got this amazingggg mac n cheese place by us now, I’m loving it.

Favorite Instagram: Who doesn’t love a doggo selfie?

Favorite Tweet: Should I become a sugar baby?

Favorite book: I FINALLY finished Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and it was amazing.

Favorite blog post: My Word For 2019

Favorite collaboration: I started as a BANGS shoes ambassador – so excited! If you want a 15% off discount for some BANGS swag, let me know!

Tell me one of your favorite things about January in the comments!

 

The Best Of My About Me Blog Posts

Looking to learn a little more about me? Check out the best of my blog posts that go into detail about myself! If you like what you read, leave a little love on the my posts from the past! 🙂

  1. I Don’t Blog About You
  2. Unintentional Asshole
  3. Proud To Be A Sorority Girl
  4. An Open Letter To My High School Self
  5. 11 Things Vegetarians Are Tired Of Hearing
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Photo by Andre Furtado on Pexels.com

Moving Out Of State – First Impressions

New Hampshire and I didn’t necessarily get off on the right foot. It can seem kind of glamorous to get up and leave the world behind, start somewhere new. But in reality, it’s very very difficult. And I knew that coming into it and I also didn’t set myself up to be in a situation where I would love it right off the bat.

I immediately jumped into a new job when I got here, a job that is much more demanding and requires me to learn a lot in a short period of time. And my boyfriend isn’t moving up with me until the end of the month which means I’ve had a lot of quiet evenings and quiet weekends.

I’m not really one for making friends and I knew that would be my biggest challenge coming up here. It’s too early for me to knock a place because of that. I’ve piled far too much on my plate (as I always do) so my first impression of moving out of state has not been a great one. Especially because we were dumped with snow which put off my boyfriend’s plans to come visit me.

I miss him and my dog and my lizard. I was well-adjusted to living together, to coming home to someone or something every day. Now it’s very very quiet and my apartment is still filled to the brim with boxes and is just a hot mess honestly. I suck at unpacking. I’m kind of just going through the motions in January, knowing that it will be better here in February.

When people start over somewhere new, they make it seem so adventurous and amazing. So I wanted to share my first impressions with you, as that is not always the case.

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Photo by Francesco Paggiaro on Pexels.com

Doing The Long Distance Relationship Thing

Temporarily, my boyfriend is living in New Jersey while I’m in New Hampshire. And while this is only for a month and not really a long distance relationship, it makes me really reflect on the people who are open to doing long distance.

My first boyfriend and I were long distance for pretty much our whole relationship. We were never more than two hours apart, but many factors ended up keeping us at a distance. When he was in college, I was in high school and when I was in college he was working and living in the city. Our relationship was forced into these spurts of time together on weekends, breaks, etc. Meaning any free time I had was dedicated to him.

And that becomes exceedingly difficult when you’re trying to put down roots somewhere. You can’t just pick up and leave every weekend or else you’ll never feel settled. And then it comes to a point where you don’t want to pick up and leave every weekend because you’re settled.

I think if my boyfriend and I were truly forced to do long distance for more than say 3 months, it would put a lot of strain on our relationship. We are both people that like to go out and do things and dedicating our free time and weekends to a 5 hour drive is just unreasonable on both ends.

I give a lot of credit to the people that can do it and I hope their quality of life and relationship are still in a good place. I’m just not the kind of person who can live off bi-weekly interactions for years at a time. But I can’t knock it if it works for other people.

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Photo by freestocks.org on Pexels.com

Winter Bucket List

Guys. I hate winter. I hate snow, I hate being cold, I hate scraping frost off my windshield every morning. It feels like the longest season ever and all I want to do is stay inside – any advice on how to like winter more is appreciate because it makes me miserable. I’m hoping some items on my winter bucket list will make it a little more enjoyable. What’s one thing you want to do this winter?

  1. Move to New Hampshire!
  2. Learn to play guitar
  3. Go to the gym 3x a week
  4. Text my friends at least once a week
  5. Go to a concert
  6. Read 5 books
  7. Be more productive after work
  8. Start journaling again
  9. Keep my blog stats up
  10. Go on a weekend trip
  11. 7,500 Instagram followers
  12. 650 Facebook likes
  13. 2,000 Twitter followers
  14. Make at least one snow angel!
  15. Get a new piercing
  16. Finish my photo album
  17. Send “we moved!” cards to friends and family
  18. Explore one new town in New England