Making New Friends

When I moved, I knew my number one struggle would be making friends. Even when I lived in New Jersey, I could have afforded to have a couple more local gal pals. But I resisted making new friends.

Everyone lived at least an hour from me which meant no one to do happy hour with or no one to do spontaneous movie nights with. Everything had to be planned weeks in advance. And while this was inconvenient, it wasn’t enough to push me to make some new friends. I settled with hanging out with coworkers every so often and mostly just making plans with my boyfriend and the dog. And then I’d see my best friends once or twice a month.

Now that I moved, I don’t think that’s going to be enough. I’m not the kind of person who can be BFF’s with my coworkers. I can be friendly and we can get drinks once in a while, but I have a hard time wanting a close friendship with them. Here, I’ll only be seeing my best friends once every couple of months. And while I love hanging out with my boyfriend, sometimes you just need girl time.

So I joined Bumble BFF and put some feelers out in my alumni groups. The problem is creating relationships from scratch. I ran into this issue when I dated too. I find it hard to create a meaningful friendship or relationship with a stranger. You didn’t know me during my hardest times, how could you possibly understand me now?

Anyway, I’m giving it a shot no matter what. I’ll attempt to go on some Bumble BFF dates and report back to you all on how it goes. At least I have my internet friends, right? 😉

grayscale photography of five people walking on road
Photo by on

How Stress Affects Me

We all get stressed in different ways about different things. This can come as a challenge when you are constantly interacting with different people. We have friends, family, relationships, and coworkers who all get stressed about different things and in different ways. Yet, we still have to figure out how to deal with it.

When I get stressed, I kind of shut down. In light stress situations, I used to be able to make lists and do things that cheered my up before everything got too heavy. But when time isn’t on your side, it’s relatively easy to let things get too heavy.

I’ve never been one to communicate well  verbally, even in happy situations. But when I’m stressed, I can barely communicate at all because my brain is chatting to itself constantly. I just don’t take the time to talk to anyone and a lot of my friendships and relationships get impacted by this. I don’t know how to push aside the overthinking to make room for other conversations, whether they are about what I’m stressed about or not.

The challenge to understand how others stress is difficult. Of course we all have our own problems and of course we all want to help our loved ones when they have problems. But how do we juggle it all? It seems possible to some people, but extremely impossible for me.

Leave me a comment about how stress affects you or how you deal with it!

photo by:

Finding Happiness After Losing It

Sometimes, we just get lost. One incident can send you into a downward spiral, a hole you just can’t climb out of.

It can be caused by the death of someone close. Or the death of a stranger. It can be caused by a change of pace, something differing in your life. Bad grades. Bad friends. A broken heart.

And you never really anticipated just how much it would hurt and just how much it would impact your life. You thought you were strong and even if you didn’t, you thought you could at least get through some things on your own. Until you’ve gone years with an empty feeling still inside you, nights spent waiting up for something that will never happen, hollow laughs and smiles.

You start to wonder if this is just how life is. If this is how the rest of your life is going to go. Ghosting and living life as a shell, never feeling whole again. Maybe feeling sad is normal for me.

But it gets better.

And one day you’ll wake up and get out of bed without a fight. You’ll go to work and laugh along with your coworkers. You’ll spend your weekends genuinely interested in being with your friends. You’ll fall asleep with a smile on your face.

And you will do it all on your own.

You grabbed the shovel and dug yourself deep into a hole of sadness, but that just means you have the tools to get yourself out. You don’t need anyone’s helping hands, although they are appreciated.

It doesn’t happen all at once, it takes time. And it’s a slow and painful process – but one day you’ll wake up and realize that this is really how life is supposed to be. This is happiness.

photo by:


10 Things I’ve Learned Working In An Office

  1. No one is ever happy with the temperature

I’m always too cold, but when I’m comfortable everyone else is too hot (see the problem?)

  1. Working people drink a lot of caffeine

Coffee before work, when you get to work, at lunch, after lunch, before the drive home, and after.

  1. At least an hour of the day is dedicated to getting caffeine and bathroom breaks

All that caffeine adds up to many bathroom breaks.

  1. Everyone is out by 5:00

At 5:01 everyone is in the parking lot making a mad dash for their cars.

  1. Office activities can get you out of work

Birthday celebrations, picnics, etc. There will always be something fun planned to take a break for.

  1. Commuting is the worst part of working full time

I always knew people suck at driving, but I learned the extent during my evening commute.

  1. Drive Carefully On Your Way To And From Work

Like one of the worst things that can happen is you accidentally cut off a coworker then have to face them in the parking lot…

  1. Everyone trickles in slowly in the morning

Some come in at 8, some 8:30, some 9, some show up late…..

  1. Eating at your desk is a very bad thing to do

You need a change of scenery, get up and go outside.

  1. Your office mates will become your family

Because of all of the above, you identify and become friends with the people in the office.  You spend most of your day with them, so you’ll always have a little office family.

photo by:
photo by: