Living By The Judgement Of Others

I did a few things this summer that made me stop in my tracks and think “wow that was really fun!” I went to the beach and swam in the ocean, I jumped in the pool, and I went on a few rides at a carnival.

These are all very normal things that probably everyone has done at least once in their life, right? Well I have too. I used to spend my summers in the ocean and I’d jump at a chance to go in a pool. I loved stomach-drop rides and carnival food. But I hadn’t done any of those things in years.

College made me VERY aware of how often people judge each other. And because of that, I began to live by that judgment. I’ve never liked wearing a bathing suit and I like it even less now so I just stopped swimming. And I almost just stopped having juvenile fun that is normal for people to enjoy because I cut myself off from so many things in fear of judgement.

I went in the ocean and didn’t care if my stomach jiggled a little bit. And I went in the pool without minding the fact that people will see me without make up. And I screamed my head off on a tower of terror ride and then laughed about how insane it was with my friends. It made me kind of sad to realize I’ve been missing out on this child-like fun because of the pressure to be cool.

Seriously, even when you’re 25 there is a pressure to be a “cool kid.”

I can’t tell people to turn their lives around and stop living by the judgment of others -because it’s hard. By nature, we just want to fit in. But I hope everyone has one of those moments where they realize they’ve given up too much for the sake of being cool, because I’m a lot happier now that I jumped in the pool.

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Photo by Tim Gouw on Pexels.com

How I Accidentally Stopped Having Fun

When I was in high school, if you asked me what I did for fun I could name a few things. I liked reading, writing, going to concerts, and hanging out with some of my friends. If you asked me what I did for fun in college I would say I like getting drunk with my best friends, I like writing, I like meeting new people.

If you asked me now, I think I would struggle a little bit. Because I still love going to concerts and seeing my friends. But I’m not too keen on alcohol anymore. I like going new places and I like writing, but both almost feel like a job to me now. My passion projects have turned into work.

I accidentally forgot to have fun because things have become so different after I’ve spent a few years out of college – I don’t know what to define as fun anymore.

I’ve picked up a few things that I like doing. I like knitting/crocheting and cross-stitching (even though I’m not great at it). I am trying to pick up reading again. And I’m trying to find joy in writing and traveling again.

There’s a lot of pressure when you work 5 days a week to make the most of the time you’re not actually working. I didn’t think it was possible, but there is a pressure to have fun that makes having fun not fun.

So I’ve taken a step back, again, to draw a very very very thick line between work and play. I need to go with the flow and just learn to have fun again.

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Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/mottram/

7 (Sort Of) Adult Life Tips

  1. It’s okay to take a couple of extra napkins, sweeteners, plastic utensils, etc. from a fast food place to stock up your own kitchen.
    But it’s probably not okay to steal toilet paper from restaurant bathrooms.
  2. Almost never take PTO for something that doesn’t make you happy.
    Seriously, taking precious time off to get a cavity filled or to clean your house is not a good use of time.
  3. Savings accounts are what dreams are made of.
    Stop opening credit cards you can’t pay off and start saving and collecting interest.
  4. Travel or do SOMETHING that breaks up the monotony.
    I know not everyone likes to travel, but don’t be afraid to throw some money at fun activities that will make the work week a little easier.
  5. Take full advantage of whatever your parents offer you.
    Never say no. Do I want to take home some of the banana bread you’re making? Yupp. If grandma wants to give me $20, am I gonna say no? Nope.
  6. Speaking of parents, don’t feel rushed to move out.
    I thought all I needed in life was to move out, but life at home is a lot easier and a lot cheaper. Really all I need in life is my mom.
  7. Don’t take it too seriously.
    A job is a job, it is not your whole entire life. Make happiness a priority. If you really sit and put things into perspective, think about all the things you can accomplish and all the things to see, you don’t have to stress hard about anything that is not adding anything to your life.
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Photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/jimoconnell/

Updated Fall Bucket List

My fall bucket list a little less heavy than my summer one, because work picks up and holidays are busy. But see below for my fall bucket list! I’ve added a couple of new things and have a lot more to get done – the next coming weeks will be very busy for me 🙂

        1. Go pumpkin picking
        2. Go apple picking
        3. Bake apple things
        4. Visit Washington D.C.
        5. Go to 3 concerts
        6. Put together a dope Halloween costume
        7. Get in better physical shape
        8. Get a new ear piercing
        9. Learn to knit/crochet something new
        10. Save money!!
        11. Reach 2,200 Instagram followers
        12. Reach 1,500 WordPress followers
        13. Make more time for friends
        14. Become more involved at work
        15. Bake pumpkin seeds
        16. Watch 13 Halloween movies
        17. Be happy

Let me know if you have anything you want to do this fall or if you have any ideas for me to add to my list🙂

10 Productive Things To Do Alone

I sometimes find my weekends completely empty. No plans, no friends to call, and very little errands to run. During this time off I like to take a couple mental health days. There’s nothing wrong with spending a weekend alone and choosing to not pack that weekend with tons of plans. Here’s a couple of things you can do alone when you find yourself with solitary free time:

1. Take a bath

Set aside a good amount of time to just soak and forget about all your other problems.

2. Go to the library

Sign up for a library card and get started on the reading list you pinned on Pinterest two years ago.

3. Binge watch a series

Escape your own reality with a non stop marathon of Netflix.

4. Go to the gym

Push yourself harder than you usually do and spend some time sweating it out in the sauna.

5. Learn a new skill

I personally learned how to crochet, I’ve made like 6 infinity scarves because that’s all I know how to do – but it’s really easy!

6. Go on a hike

Somewhere safe you can go alone, obviously. The scenery is guaranteed to make your day.

7. Run errands

Get done allllll of the things you’ve been putting off.

8. Clean!

I guarantee there is one spot in your house or one drawer in your room that needs reorganizing.

9. Get your nails done

Or do what you do to pamper yourself.

10. Shop!

Spend a little money and splurge. You’re not spending $16 on two cranberry vodkas at the bar with your friends so go buy yourself a new top or necklace.

photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/laurenunfscurtisward/
photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/laurenunfscurtisward/

7 Reasons Why You Should Love Halloween

It may sound weird to you, but Halloween has always been my favorite holiday. Here’s why:

1.You can be whatever you want

It’s the one day a year you can dress up as someone else, forget about who you are for a while, and not be judged for it.

2. It’s a holiday for all ages

When Christmas comes around, I don’t have butterflies in my stomach anymore while waiting for Santa. I may not be Trick or Treating anymore, but I’m still dressing up for Halloween!

3. There are countless fun fall activities leading up to Halloween.

Pumpkin picking, pumpkin carving, apple picking, jumping in piles of leaves, etc. So. much. fun.

4. It’s a kick off to the best holidays of the year!

First you’re celebrating Halloween, and then Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years are around the corner.

5. Halloween movies are the best movies.

13 Nights of Halloween > 25 Days of Christmas.

6. Halloween has a different vibe than any other holiday.

It’s scary! There’s no forced family time and the pressure to be filled with the heartwarming holiday spirit. It’s goofy, odd, and enjoyable – no pressure.

7. Candy.

Enough said.

photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/kevinomara/
photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/kevinomara/

Why Your Best Friends Are Your Actual Soulmates

How many times have we heard the Sex and the City quote:  “Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with.”

photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/jessevaughan/
photo by: https://www.flickr.com/photos/jessevaughan/

It really couldn’t be more true. I spent a large part of my young life in a relationship that I used to replace friendships.  My high school friends weren’t all that great and when a boy who cared about me came along, I used it as an excuse to get out of friendships that weren’t going anywhere anyway.

It all changed when I went to college and when I became single.

Never in a million years did I think that I would have the friends I have now.  They are beautiful people who are always right behind me, ready to push me up when I’m about to fall.  Friends are your true soulmates because in a relationship or not, they will always be there.

I’ve found myself, as a single gal, doing things with my friends that most people do with their significant other.  Going out to dinner, to the movies, and on adventures aren’t solely activities that can be done with a boyfriend or girlfriend. In the lull between relationships, friends will be there to watch Netflix with you and binge eat Dominos pizza with you because they want to.  When you are in a relationship, friends will still be on the sideline, stepping in every so often.

Your friends hang out with you because they love you and think you’re a good time. They don’t have to pencil you into their schedule.  There is no sense of obligation when your friends are your soulmates because you always want to see them.

You don’t need them all the time, but they’re always there when you need them.  There is an amount of love that doesn’t need to be spoken, but can be felt every time you’re crying from laughing so hard or laughing after you’re done drunkenly crying too hard. Not every friend deserves the label of “soulmate”, but to those who find their true soulmates – you are one of the luckiest people in the world.