I’ve basically never minded Valentine’s Day. I think the only year it really bothered me was a couple months after me and my long term ex broke up and I went to a party, cried, ordered a ton of pizza and cried some more. IT HAPPENS.
I’ve also never been super excited about the day. I like taking the chance to show a lil love to the people in my life, but I think that should be done regardless of a holiday.
ANYWAY! Here’s some posts I’ve written in the past about Valentine’s Day to get you in the mood. 😉 Enjoy!
Call me a cynic, but my first thought was what if something really dramatic happens and we break up and we get stuck in this lease????
2. Will we get sick of each other?
Right now it feels really inconvenient to not live with each other, but maybe we’ll find out that there is really such a thing as too much time together.
3. Am I going to have to give up my alone time?
I’ve expressed my need for alone time often to my boyfriend so I’m not that worried about it…but we’ll see.
4. How big of a next step is this really?
I was kind of like yeah moving in together will be convenient, but other people are like ooooh are you getting a ring soon?
5. It’s not really that big of a deal.
Some people will feel like it’s a big deal, but for me it’s just a way to make our relationship better. Sure, all of the above are concerns. But things happen and maybes can’t keep you from diving in to something that will make you happy!
Any advice for couples who are moving in together? Leave it below!
I often see the worst in people. So when someone tells me they will change, I barely believe them. This is partly because I don’t want to be disappointed and partly because most of the time, they don’t change.
I think there are the parts of us that make us who we are and those are the parts no one should ever ask you to change. Whether it be your friends, a significant other, or family. They can’t ask you to change, but they shouldn’t be forced to deal with something they don’t like. So you can try to change for your significant other or you can let the relationship go.
If you’re asking someone to change and they’re unwilling or can’t see why they need to change, then it will never happen. You’re putting all your eggs in a basket that’s ready to fall apart.
If they can see the change that needs to be made, they may have a greater chance at actually making that change. But most of the time, relationship problems come from the core of someone. It comes from a part of their personality that has been there for years, something that is deep rooted. Can people really change those parts of themselves?
It all depends on your want or need to change and the recognition of the problem. I’m sure people can change, I just rarely see it.
I grew up reading romances and pawning over Nicholas Sparks movies. It seemed to me that love was hard at first, but then you would get over the initial battle and everything would be like a fairy tale.
Emotions are emotions. They are unreliable and powerful, and love may be the most volatile of them all. Even if you’ve met the one, your relationship will always require work.
You’ll always find something to fight about whether it’s over getting enough attention or putting the cap back on the toothpaste.
It requires constant effort. You can’t just buy flowers during the honeymoon stage then sit back and relax for the next 50 years. What kind of life or relationship would that be?
But the effort and the work and the bickering is all worth it for the person you love and want to be with. There will be trials and tests, big and little problems. Life isn’t a fairy tale, but a little work in a relationship goes a long way towards your happy ending.
So I had taken about three years off from committed relationships before diving into the one I’m in now. The last real committed relationship I was in lasted four years and this one has just hit the one year anniversary! 🙂
I learned a lot about myself in the time I spent casually dating and being single. It took me a long time to recover from my last break up, to find myself, and to open up to someone again. So here are the things I’ve learned in the one year I’ve been in a relationship:
No two people are the same – don’t compare your current boyfriend to your ex.
Being alone is still very important, you can’t spend all your time with your significant other without going nuts.
There will be doubts, you just have to know if they’re valid or not.
Communication will save your relationship. Be honest, always.
You’ll drift away from your friends. That’s a big part of being in the honeymoon stage and growing older in general.
No one is as happy as they make themselves seem on social media. Everyone fights, bickers, and gets annoyed at each other.
Always show appreciation. I am constantly surprised by how patient my boyfriend is with me and I never stop thanking him for it.
Be yourself from day one. I was weird when we went on our first date and I’m probably a little weirder now, but there were no surprises as the relationship went on.
Being in a relationship isn’t like being in a jail. I used to cringe at the thought of being tied down, but it’s really not bad when you find the right person.
Take everything at your own pace. People all around me are getting engaged and buying houses. But I’m a slowpoke when it comes to big steps and that’s okay!
If you’ve been with someone for one year or ten years, you have probably hit a relationship rut at some point. I think these are the times that challenge us the most, that force us to decide if this is what we really want.
It’s a time where you’re probably fighting a lot without a good explanation, where you’re unhappy, and where you don’t know what to do. The most comforting advice I can offer is that everyone goes through them and you’re not alone. It’s okay to question if this is what you want to and to realize your unhappiness. But you have to do something about it, you can’t just let it build up and explode.
Getting out of a relationship rut takes communication that sometimes hurts. It’s alllll about the honesty. But when you put all of your feelings on the table and openly listen to your partner’s feelings, then you’ll be able to see how you got here in the first place.
If you’re like me, relationship ruts usually occur when you let things get too comfortable. When you stop going on dates, stop putting make up on for when they come over, stop trying to look good for them and make them feel good. It’s when you start ordering in and watching Netflix every night and stop making them feel special.
And you don’t even notice it happening because it’s nice to feel comfortable. But it’s overwhelmingly boring and unhelpful to stick to the same routine and just stop appreciating each other.
If you’re in a relationship rut, don’t worry. We’ve all been there and if you want things to work then you can make them work. Be open and honest when you don’t feel good about the way things are going, the earlier you make a move – the better!