Tips For Making Somewhere Your Home

I’ve always been more prone to making a home in people instead of a location. But when you start over somewhere new, it’s so important to nest and love the place you are. People are great, but you need to love your home too.

Here are some tips for making somewhere your home.

  1. Personalize the crap out of your home
    Our apartment is decked out with things that mean a lot to us. Most of our decor is unique and one of a kind, things we picked out together during our travels instead of HomeGoods. Whether it’s lots of photos or meaningful decor, personalize your home.
  2. Start looking through Facebook events nearby
    Looking for ways to start loving your city? I go through nearby Facebook events and mark interested in anything that seems fun. When that date comes up, we have lots of options for exploring!
  3. Find the restaurant you love
    This is so important, right? You have to nail down your pizza place, your favorite take out place, your favorite sit down place. Nothing makes me feel more at home than food.
  4. Surround yourself with people who feel like home
    Whether that’s your dog, your friends from back home, or your family. Make a point to keep those people in your life.
  5. Meet a friend
    Join a club, go on BumbleBFF, get close to your coworkers! All you need is one friend to really start fitting into a place.

Do you have any tips for making somewhere a home? Share them below!

 

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10 Things I Need To Do In NJ Before I Leave

Everyone has little pieces of their home state that they can’t find anywhere else. I decided to write down 10 things I need to do in New Jersey before I move to New Hampshire. Because I know the bagels and pizza won’t be as good, and I know I won’t see the ocean for a while, and bits of my home just won’t be in New Hampshire. But once I’m there, I’ll be sure to make a list of 10 things I need to do in New Hampshire. For now, here’s my list:

  1. Wawa coffee everyyyyy week
  2. Get a North Jersey Bagel
  3. Visit Asbury Park
  4. See the ocean
  5. Lots of jersey pizza
  6. Ring in the New Year with my best friends
  7. Drive past my childhood home
  8. Sunday dinner at grandma’s
  9. Get my gas pumped (I’ll miss this the most)
  10. Go to a diner late at night.
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Leaving Your Home

I’ve lived in New Jersey basically my whole life. I was born in another state, lived in another, but that was all before memories really started to form. I grew up in New Jersey, went to college in New Jersey, and built my life here.

And while I love everything about this extremely underrated state, I never wanted to stay here forever. First I wanted to go to college in Canada, then maybe Ireland, then I wanted to move south as quick as I could. But I never did. I stayed. Until now.

Now I’m leaving my home and I don’t think it’s quite hit me yet that everything I know will be a 6 hour drive away when I move to New Hampshire. All of my friends, most of my family, my coworkers, and familiarity will be so far gone. It’s nerve-wracking.

But I’m ready to leave it behind. My adult life has become so busy anyway that I think some distance between me and all of those things will actually make the bond stronger. If the bond becomes weaker, maybe it wasn’t meant to be in the first place.

I think it’s so important to start over somewhere new, to live in new places, to meet new people. Those experiences help shape you into a well-rounded person – it’s part of the reason I travel as much as I can. It makes me a better person. And even though I’m terrible at new things and meeting new people, I at least have to try.

It’s so sad to leave your home, but there is a whole world out there to explore and we owe it to ourselves to experience it.

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Finding A Home In People

When I was in college, my parents sold and moved out of my childhood home. At this point, I had been living at school most of the time, over every break. I came home one weekend and packed my stuff and said goodbye.

My childhood home hadn’t been my home for a long time. My room had been repainted and the whole place just held a lot of memories from my youth that I didn’t particularly enjoy especially after my high school boyfriend and I had just broken up. I was fine with leaving it all behind and I had found a new home at college.

And when my grandparents passed away, their house was torn down. I did one last walk through – but I wasn’t sad about saying goodbye to it. My grandparents weren’t there anymore and the last years they were there were painful and nothing at all like the memories I had created as a kid.

I walk into my other grandparent’s home and I still feel my home. I take deep breaths and try to hold on to the feeling there. But after they’re gone, I don’t think it will feel like anything at all.

Because I’ve always made homes out of people. My family grew out of our childhood home, we were located hours and plane rides away from each other and it wasn’t the home that kept us all together anymore. I feel at home with them, no matter where I am. And even at college, I tried to live in my house after everyone had left for summer and graduated – but the people were my home, not that house.

When I move out of a place (and I have moved out of quite  a few places for a 25 year old), I stare at the empty rooms and I feel sad. But as soon as I am together with my people in my next new adventure, I don’t really feel a nostalgia or need to be back in that old place.

I have no attachment to where I am because no matter where I go I can visit one of those important people and feel at home again.

apartment cabinet chair contemporary
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A Recap Of The Places I’ve Lived In My Twenties

I think I am the exception to most people my age, but since graduating college I will have lived in 5 different places. I graduated at 22 and am now 24 to put things in context for you. That’s 5 places in 2 and a half years and you can bet they were all life lessons.

When I graduated from college, I convinced my parents to let me stay at the house I’d been living in the past two years of college because I got an internship sort of nearby. College campuses in the summer are a whole new type of weird I can’t even explain and they are also very empty. I spent a lot of time living between different houses and traveling a long ways to work. When the internship ended, I moved home and got a job there.

Living at home is definitely something I know a lot of people can relate to. It’s like you automatically revert back  to your 16 year old self when living with your parents. My parents had moved out of my childhood home when I was in college, so this was pretty strange for me. I didn’t really have my own room that was truly mine with any space for my stuff. I saved a lot of money, but my job was very basic and my parents were driving me nuts. So 6 months after I moved in, I got a new job and moved out.

I was in a rush and on a deadline, so I moved into a house with 3 other roommates. They were all strangers and they continued to be strangers the 10 months I lived there. I’m not very outgoing and everyone was on different schedules and were different ages. I spent most of the time in my room or tip toeing to the bathroom and kitchen. I really thought it was going to be super temporary, but I stayed there for almost a year until it became just too weird for me.

So, I moved out again. This time into a single apartment with a small kitchenette attached to the living room. I was paying for everything myself so I didn’t buy cable/wifi and I also didn’t have a freezer or oven. I’m coming up on a year at this apartment and it’s kind of amazing that I lived without things that a lot of people consider necessities. While I loved the apartment, it was time to take a next step and move in with my boyfriend.

In a few weeks we’ll be moving into a two bedroom, two bathroom apartment with a loft that I’m obsessed with. After this, I really hope to stay put for a while because anyone who has moved a lot knows that moving in and out is not fun. At all.

hc
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My 8 Favorite Places In New Jersey

I’ve lived in New Jersey for basically my whole life. I really really hated it at one point, then learned to love its beauty. Yes, it really is beautiful for those who call it the armpit of America! Here are 8 places I love in New Jersey that you should visit if you ever get the opportunity to stop in!

  1. Grounds for Sculpture
    A large garden filled with sculptures, art, and surprises around every corner. The collections are constantly evolving. You can see me at it here.
  2. Schooley’s Mountain
    I’m not great at hiking, so a small park where I can still see waterfalls is great for me! I’ve been visiting Schooley’s Mountain since I was in high school.
  3. Jenny Jump
    I haven’t been to Jenny Jump in a while, but from the top of this little mountain you can see a lot of New Jersey. It’s very peaceful.
  4. Sea Isle City
    Everyone in New Jersey has their preferred shore town, mine is Sea Isle City. You ca catch me here most summers.
  5. Collingswood
    I’m weirdly obsessed with South Jersey and Collingswood epitomizes that for me. Check out the Pop Shop if you ever want some reallyyy good food.
  6. Asbury Park
    Asbury Park is like magical to me. I didn’t even discover it until this year, but the murals and the boardwalk are just so special and artsy.
  7. Rowan University
    This is where I went to college! Rowan is a home for me.
  8. Viaducts
    So, it’s illegal to go here and I dropped a picture of it below. The viaducts are a Weird NJ spot, it is tunnels and tunnels of graffiti and it’s amazing!

Have you ever been to New Jersey? Would love to hear your thoughts and favorite places in the comments 🙂

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Getting The Credit You Deserve

We, as humans, need gratification. We need to be told we are doing things well, it inspires us to do better. Whereas constant negative criticism, though it makes us want to fix our mistakes, often makes us do worse.

But we just don’t always get the credit that we think we deserve.

Whether it be at home, in your relationship, at work – we aren’t recognized as often as we’d like to be and this can put us in a weird place. Because as much as we’d like to think we’re independent and can do things on our own, the motivation of others is what really pushes us in the end.

So when your boyfriend takes care of you all week when you’re sick, tell him how much you appreciate him. Little words go a long way.

And when your boss isn’t giving you the praise you need, maybe you need to adjust the way you are working. Make it so that you cannot be ignored. I have always believed that there is nothing wrong with tooting your own horn, especially if other people neglect to do it for you.

We don’t always get the credit we deserve and it can be disheartening. All you can do is recognize what you’re doing right and what you’re doing wrong. And strive to be the best person you can be. Relying on other people will never turn out the way you want it to. When they fail you, know that you can rely on yourself.

hc
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