I’m in Egypt this week! I haven’t had time to write a lot of posts in November due to work obligations and planned trips. So while I’m away, why not catch up on some of my favorite posts that you might have missed? I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving 🙂 xoxo Rosie
If you read my post where I documented all of my negative thoughts in 24 hours, you’ll know that I have a lot of negative thoughts about myself. We are so hard on ourselves. And this is on top of the weight that the world is already putting on our shoulders. Responsibilities are always going to pile up, people are always going to disappoint you, and life is just not going to go as planned.
But that’s okay. Seriously, give yourself a break.
You can’t control the actions of others. You can’t control how people treat you, you can’t control life’s unforeseen twists and turns. And you can’t punish yourself for the things you can’t control. Sometimes people are just going to suck and sometimes bad things are just going to happen.
For the things you can control, be realistic. You can’t always control every aspect of your job, you can’t just quit when time’s get tough. You can’t always control how much time you have in a day to just be yourself. But you can empower yourself to learn how to deal with it better, to speak up for yourself, or to make changes when change is necessary.
But you seriously need to give yourself a break.
Take one day this week to jot down every negative thing you thought about yourself. See how hard you’re being and how unrealistic you’re being. Because you deserve better from other people, but you definitely deserve better from yourself.
Yesterday, I decided to write down every negative thought I had about myself or the things I can’t control. Because I know I’m greeting life’s challenges with a bad attitude and I want to change it, at least as much as I can. Here’s every bad thing I thought in a day, tomorrow I will begin to work on shortening this list and creating a more positive one. I want to greet the day with a better outlook and I want to stop being so hard on myself. So here it goes.
Why am I always sick?
My skin is so broken out.
My skin is so dry.
This would look better on me if I was skinny.
I am not a morning person.
I’m so tired of stupid people.
This is the worst drive ever.
I’m already annoyed and I haven’t even gotten to work yet.
I should probably skip breakfast .
I already know I’m going to be tired later.
I put way too much work on my plate.
No one even cares about my Instagram or blog.
I wish people had a little more faith in me.
I’d rather be asleep.
I’m so selfish.
I feel like crap.
I wish I had more style…
I wish I could just make a decision on my own.
I told myself I was going to work out tonight but I’m probably just going to sit on the couch.
I’m so lazy.
I really need to start dieting.
I am a pretty sucky girlfriend.
* A LOT of thoughts about past actions *
This isn’t a post for people to pity me, it’s a challenge for all of us to just at least acknowledge all the bad things we say to ourselves every day. With that acknowledgement, maybe we can make a change.
I know for some people, when Halloween is over that means Christmas season has begun. I am NOT one of those people, I’m sucking up every bit of fall before winter comes because I hate winter and I’m not even that big of a fan of Christmas! I’m getting through my fall bucket list slowly – have you accomplished any of your fall goals?
1. Go apple picking 2. Go pumpkin picking
3. Learn something new
4. Knit a sweater for my dog 5. Make macrame wall hangings It is in a very sad state right now but it’s in progress…
6. Reach 650 Facebook likes
7. Reach 7,100 Instagram followers 8. Reach 1,350 Twitter followers
9. Make more time for the gym 10. Introduce a habit that will help with stress I’ve gotten back into the habit of making lists, they help me prioritize and de-stress!
11. Watch a bunch of halloween movies
12. Change my hair
13. Go to a concert
14. Go out of the country
15. Go out of the state 3 times
16. Read 3 books
I’ve suffered for migraines since my young teens. And for a while I thought it was just something that everyone gets. We all have headaches, we all have migraines, I just get mine more than other people.
But while most people have had headaches, they don’t know the debilitation of a migraine. When the ONLY way to get rid of the pulsing pain in your head is to take excedrin, put a cold wash cloth on your head, and sleep. And if you can’t do that, then you just have to spend your day with your migraine. All light is sensitive and all noises are louder than usual. You’re probably nauseous and cranky, it feels like someone is stabbing you in the brain. And you have to work through it, because that’s life with migraines.
You know when someone’s had a migraine before when you tell them you have one and they give you the “I’m so sorry” face. You know when someone hasn’t had a migraine before when you tell them you have one and they’re confused as to why a headache has you couch-ridden.
My migraines are stress induced and I’m stressed out…a lot. In college, every hangover wasn’t just accompanied by that dehydrated splitting headache, but a full blown migraine putting pressure on my temples. Every work day that goes south too fast has me laying on the couch as soon as 5pm hits. Any weekend where I had a stressful sleep includes me trying to shake off the migraine all morning long.
Migraines take time out of my day and they’ve definitely kept me from doing some things I’ve wanted to do. Almost every time we travel, I’m graced with a migraine when we land. Which means our first day of the trip is either miserably powering through or sleeping it off.
The people who don’t have them don’t get it, the people who have them get it too much.
I’ve never had a good memory and I’ve never had a huge attachment to places. But if I have a token of a place or a photo of a time, then I’m able to remember the event more clearly. I collect things from important people and places I go and I’ve become very sentimental.
I have boxes of things I’ve acquired over the years. Diaries, cards, ticket stubs, birthday presents that came from people who I left in the past, a lot of bad poetry from high school. I have a hard time throwing those things away because they are probably the only things that will trigger those memories for me.
I went through some of the boxes recently and could only throw away a few things. Diaries that mostly only spoke about how my family were jerks and how I was fat, photos of people who left me with bad feelings, and trinkets that I couldn’t find an attachment to.
But there’s so much left and the problem with being sentimental isn’t that I’m going to become a hoarder one day. The problem is that these things make me miss people who have hurt me, who I don’t even like anymore. They make me miss times that I was actually miserable during. But by being so sentimental, it’s easy to forget the bad. Even when they are things that should be long gone.
It’s hard to be so sentimental, I feel oddly attached to dumb things and then feel like reaching out to people who stopped caring about me altogether. It’s a dangerous road and I’ve found it best to just keep those boxes closed.