A lot of the time, I see couples that I never want to end up being like. I can tell they’ve been in it for a while and as time as passed they just grew comfortable enough to never give their relationship up.
And then some of the time, I see couples who got it right. They’re in love and happy 20 years later, they’re with their best friend.
But how do you know what you’re doing is what’s right? Is it just luck that you gave the right person a chance, that you didn’t veer from the course even though you wanted to? I don’t understand how people know if they should stick with something or see what else is out there.
Especially now, in a time where options are everywhere. And it’s not just relationships. It’s jobs, it’s where you live, it’s what dog you adopt, it’s anything that you have choosing power over. How do you know that this job will be the best one you ever have? What if you quit for something that seems like a better opportunity, but actually ends up being a dud?
There are pages and pages of job opportunities. There are states and countries we are free to move to at any time. There are dating apps and social media and a frenzy of people at your finger tips. Something may feel right right now, but how do you commit to something when you don’t know what it will feel like in 6 months, a year, 10 years?
So how do you know what you’re doing right now is what’s right? How do you choose to stick with it when there are endless possibilities in the world?
Rosie Culture 
I literally just posted about how I don’t trust my own sense of right and wrong, let alone my own sense of self…LOL…it’s like there is a vibe in the air after reading this!
Sometimes, I don’t think you do know, you just ride the wave to where it takes you.
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My last relationship lasted 8 years and I realized towards the end that we were going through the motions of being together, living more like roommates than an actual couple. When I brought this to his attention, he laughed it off, which was a red flag. I’m glad I decided to end things even though it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. We were comfortable with each other and a part of me will always love him, but it wasn’t the romantic love I want. I just wasn’t right.
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8 years is so long! I think one of my biggest fears is putting in that amount of time then making the realization because it’s so much harder then. Good for you for having the strength to move on. Did you have any idea before that that it might not work out?
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None whatsoever! Part of the reason we were together for so long is because we started dating in high school. In the beginning of the relationship, we were both so young. Then we entered into young adulthood where we started really figuring each other out. Then we got too comfortable with one anther and in a way, lost touch.
The scary part is I could have seen myself marrying him throughout most of the relationship. So glad I didn’t!
I wrote about this in a post of my own some time ago if you’re interested… https://bexoxoblog.wordpress.com/2017/01/02/soulmate-vs-red-string-of-fate/
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I will definitely check it out! Thank you for sharing
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Well, I can only speak for myself, but my wife and I knew pretty much right away that we were it for each other. It’s hard to explain, but something you just know, and there’s a huge difference between lust and being truly in love. Now, that’s not to say we haven’t had our trials and tribulations. But we never have wavered in wanting to be right here, together. If it’s really it, you’ll know. Only you can determine who, what, and why, but if it’s real, you’ll know. As for jobs? There’s likely no such thing as the perfect job. But, I don’t live to work, I work to live.
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Thank you for commenting! Your relationship sounds like a great one and I wonder if people who are married like you two also knew from the beginning that it was right.
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Not sure. One thing I’ll say for you though, being that you’re so young, is do not settle. If it’s not right, and you know it, let it go. You’re head and gut will tell you. Listen to it. 😊
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Thank you 🙂 you’re right
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I think it’s a gut feeling. I don’t have time for a lot of people. I think I seriously like a guy about once every 4-5 years haha. That’s a lot of time in between men who could be ‘The One’. I’ve only ever had the ‘I can see a future here…’ feeling once, and it was INSANE. Like, never liked someone like that before. It didn’t work out, but I’m a big believer that you just KNOW if something/someone is right or not. If they’re meant for you, there will be another chance.
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I get that! I casually dated for like 3 years before committing to a relationship again because I’ll only do it if I see a future, just scares me to think that even though you think that it still might not work out!
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Day by day. I get weighed down by those thoughts and often have to remind myself life is out of my control. We’re not guaranteed tomorrow so make the most of today. Im here for a specific purpose and that’s to be the love of God to other people. I know I can trust God to lead and provide. It’s hard to explain on a comment section through my texting. It’s even harder t comprehend. Best way I can put it is just take it day by day. Dont waste today worrying about what may not be tomorrow.
I hope that helps.
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It does! I waste a lot of time worrying and you’re right, not everything needs to be worried about right now
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When it’s right, you’ll know. If you have to ask yourself if something’s right, then it most likely isn’t.
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